Saturday, March 25, 2006

Proof of spring




My much loved garden is now providing daily proof that spring is here (or nearly here anyway). Despite wide fluctuations in weather and temperatures, my flowers are starting to come up. There are buds on the magnolia and dogwood trees too. It brings me great joy to know that soon I will have blooms of irises, lilies, roses, and much much more to greet me every morning!

Distraction

Earlier today I went downstairs to watch the first of 8 (yes, 8) women's basketball games for the weekend. I was doubly thrilled to enjoy left over ice cream ("scoop o' chocolate, scoop o' vanilla, don't waste my time") with peanut butter sauce (cannot be beat). When I took it out of the freezer, however, it seemed a little more like liquid than like ice cream. Being totally distracted, I simply put the container down on the counter, said "that's weird", and proceeded to watch basketball.

A few hours later, Tracy came downstairs, and promptly realized that the refrigerator was no longer working. Ahh... the joys of owning a home. So, while Teri and Bill are welcoming their beautiful baby girl into the world, we may be working on a new delivery of our own (only slightly less exciting).

Friday, March 24, 2006

Cigars... they're not just for babies anymore.



I just smoked a stogie. Well, half a stogie.

I sort of like the ritual of this. It's not anymore outrageous than plunking down 5 dollars for a non-fat soy vanilla marble mocha Macchiato. (And I don't think it's all that less healthy either.)

Especially when all the people you love are popping out newborn humans, there should be some kind of discusting, celebratory event more unique than raising a glass and shouting "le'chayim."

I also like being outside with the boys. I love my female peeps- Lord knows I's luvs the ladies, but once there was a time when I had a whole mess of male buddies, and frankly they are cool to hang with too.

This is what can happen if you appreciate your own womanhood BUT you are also not too addicted to lipstick: You can swing both ways and fit in with the chicks and the dudes!

Sweet, sweet vices. Sweet sweet babies... together you give me excuses to try all kinds of crap!

Now I have to go wash my hands and brush my teeth to get the stench off of me :)

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Babies, babies, everywhere- Part Deux

This is the one you've all been waiting for folks...
Mac B was born at 8:09 this am. She weighed in at 8lbs and 6oz and was 19.5 inches long. She's the bomb and we are now officially aunts!!!!




Here's a photo of proud Papa (looking like Dr. Drake Ramore:)



Here's Nana supervising the nurses during the newborn assessment:


First real cuddle with Mommy and Daddy:



Being introduced to her HOT aunts:


Okay, since you're all begging, I'll give you one more...

Me, giving her the finger:

We love you baby Mac... Mac Attack... little spuds...
You're the Mac-daddy!!!
We are so psyched you are finally here.
Congratulations Web and B, we love you too!


Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Thirteen point seven-five hours and counting...

Soon I'll be an aunt.
I have a lot to teach this child...
Books, politics, sports, and style- her parents dabble in these subjects, but truth be told, they can use a little support!!!
Also, Karma is a bitch, and with all the "tie-phase" jokes that have been uttered by my beloved sister, it is practically inevitable that this little, baby girl will have some issues with her hair.
But I'll be there, to gently guide her along the bumpy road...
Can't wait, can't wait, can't wait!!!

Saturday, March 18, 2006

Little dude gets a name...

Benjamin David... aaawwwwww- how perfectly cute!

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Babies, Babies EVERYWHERE...

There have been many important babies born in the last few months:
Baby Margaret Mary ('lil Peg) to Katie and Hugh-bone
Baby Mason to Gregger and Jules
Baby Ellie to Kelly and Randy
Baby Jack to Jess and Mike
Baby Bennett to Kate and Josh
Baby Kree to Rana and Keith.

And now this hansome dude:



Baby Callahardmaniac, a.k.a. Nameless McAlias...
Welcome to the world little boy! We hope you get an official title real soon!
We love you Katy and Ray, Congratualtions!!!

Tune in next week for "Babies, Babies EVERYWHERE, part deux"

When Irish eyes aren't smiling



Have you ever had a week where your major accomplishment was picking up the used tissues strewn on the floor of various rooms of the house? I have.

There’s this bit of physical humor that I act out when driving in my car. If I have finished eating or drinking anything, I pitch it over my shoulder -full speed- into the hatchback, which I clean out about once a week (okay, maybe once a month.) The unexpected immediacy of the transition between using/eating an item and throwing it away, the swiftness of the toss, and the childishness of the act usually elicit a smile or giggle from my passenger. (Side note: Pellet is to BF Skinner rat what laughter is to Tracy.)

Over time, we’ve moved some of this vaudeville act in doors, but have excluded food items and most trash from the prop list. Tissues are soft enough to be safely whizzed across a room. We aim in the general direction of the trash bucket; but frankly, it’s funnier if we don’t even aim.

When one of us has a period of extreme mucus production (most commonly caused by illness and/or tears) the other of us has the job of giggling at and then cleaning up tissues tossed (brusquely) in anger, disgust, or despair.

Sometimes you wake up, wipe your puffy eyes and realize you must be in a rough patch if no one has noticed that mucho mucus production has left empty tissue boxes overturned and once soggy (now crusty) tissues crumpled on the floor like plot points on a scatter chart in every room of the house.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

I guess it's my turn to try this... sit back and relax, I've gotten old




Following my wife's lead, I'm going to give this "sentences" thing a shot.

1) I am born at YNHH on my great-grandmother's 82nd birthday. The delivery is a disaster except for the fact that all of us survive. I spend the first year of my life surrounded by love and adoration but without the services of the medical malpractice attorney that would have heard the story of my birth and fought to change my family's tax bracket for generations to come.

2) I start walking and talking. My parents bring home Teri- instantly and forever, my best friend.

3) I'm cute as hell. I talk in full sentences. I help with the baby. I sing "Happy Birthday" to Jesus on Christmas. I sit anywhere my parents put me for as long as they need to without crying.

4) I do a lot of singing and dancing and know all the words and lyrics to the plays that my dad is in, but I am a very shy little girl.

5) I learn to swim and go to Scooter School (nursery school.)

6) I go to kindergarden. We do this totally dorky daily stretching as we say the alphabet- I think it's cool.

7) I have Mrs. Robbie for 1st grade. I like her but don't like leavingy my mother's side. I get scared and cry everytime I have to go to an outside class or everytime there is a substitute teacher. My parents buy a house on 380 Oak avenue.

8) 2nd grade, Mrs Hague. I get the part of Hoppy Bunny in the class play (it's the only part I was even interested in, God knows why.) Auntie Sheila, my dad's sister, dies of melanoma- it is the first time I see my dad cry in saddness.

9) Mrs. Robbie moves to the 3rd grade and so do I- slightly less crying this year.

10) 4th grade: I am busting out of my shell little by little. I get in trouble for "acting up" in class for the first time... I was drawing faces on my thumbs and pretended my thumbs were having a conversation. Mrs. Diamond had a cow about it.

11) I love reading and history, music and gym. I want to do better in the mental arithmatic competitions that Mr. Smith conducts. Playing the flute is hard.

12) 6th grade... I quit flute and my dad finds out when he asks Mr. music-teacher-man "How's she doing with the flute?" on parent-teacher night. I can't wait for grammar school to be over so I can quit girl scouts too.

13) Dodd Jr. High School... I really like switching classes and mostly all my teachers. I meet Mr. Wyllie. He's the smartest teacher I've ever had. He talks to us like we are adults- he sometimes even swears! I learn more from him- I think- than I will ever learn from anyone. I play softball and sing in the chorus. I get my period.

14) Mr Wyllie also teaches 8th grade history. He asks me to be in charge of scholastic magazine distribution. He gives me a laminated pass to get out of all my study halls. The pass lets me "take a friend" to help pass out the magazines- it's a good year!

15) I go to High School where my parents met 18 years before; I get involved in music, theater, and softball. I have the same group of 4 or 5 friends that I've been in school with for years, but I become friends with a bunch of Juniors and Seniors too.

16) Sophmore year- I am able to navagate comfortably between a bunch of different "clicks" within the high school. My best friends are in Chorus and softball. Academics are generally good. I hate latin. I'm confounded by math. Writing and History are still my favorite subjects. I earn a varsity letter in softball.

17) Junior year- I swear the only class i remember is Chemistry. My chem friends and I keep a notebook that's like a prehistoric blog containing all kinds of commentary about the class and teachers. I don't tell anyone, but decide i will ask my friend, Jesse, to the prom. Before I get the chance, he calls and asks me. (It still rates at one of my top ten "best" phone calls!) I run for class president; not so much because I want the job but because I don't think the two most popular girls in our class should run for "co-president" uncontested. I lose but it is a respectable showing. I meet John. It is a great year, dispite my terrible acne.

18) I fall in love, love, love. I make All-State (chorus) as a Soprano and am elected All State pitcher. Our team wins the league championship. I apply to 2 schools and chose UConn when BC doesn't pick me for "early decision."

19) UConn: Classes are hard. Dorm life is awesome. (I live in the jungle) I gain the "freshman 15" and go on the pill. (so make that the freshman 20)

20) I become an RA as a sophomore and earn my room and board. So really, every extra serving at the "all you can eat" cafeteria is like giving myself a raise. (I gain another 15.)

21) Nursing school really begins. I love my clinical instructor, but am totally stressed out and can't really keep up in pathophysiology. By the end of the first semester, it becomes clear that I will be staying at UConn for a 5th year.

22) Still in love with John, I start to notice women more. Life seems great- then things become complicated.

23) I get through nursing school. My personal life starts to fall apart. I break up with John.

24) I drive cross country for the first time. I become an ICU nurse. I get my first "real" girlfriend. We break up. I get my first apartment. I come out to my parents. I feel like things are starting to be okay again.

25) John dies. It is unexpected and devastating. I feel like someone reached into my chest and tore my aorta off my heart. I spend the rest of the year trying to remember how to breathe.

26) I turn 25 and much of the next year is a blur. I think everytime I have a birthday I will whisper to myself, "not everybody gets to turn (insert age.)" I grieve hard, like it's a full time job. I move to Boston with my sister. We live in a phat pad on Mass ave, and i learn to laugh again. I wake up nearly every day feeling lucky. I think living in Boston saves my life. I get into grad school.

27) I become a Yalie but commute to school from my HOME in Boston. It takes the whole year before that gets tired enough for me to want to move back to CT. I meet Katy and tons of other amazing people in New Haven. I get a tatoo.

28) I spend the summer on Martha's Vineyard, as a travel nurse. It's the best summer of my life because of the ocean, my tan, and the deliciously kind and crazy people i meet while on the island. I donate eggs. I move into an apartment with Nealie. I continue my graduate studies, continue ICU nursing, and fall in love, love, love again.

29) I move in with Katy and graduate from Yale.

30) We move to Hartford. I become a home care nurse and a nursing clinical instructor. My father's father passes away. I propose to Katy and offer her a diamond ring. She says "yes" and returns the favor a few weeks later. We're engaged!

31) I go to Vegas for the first time. My sister marries Bill. I start working at Fair Haven.

32) My Grandpa "Bean" dies. Katy's Grandma Tierney dies. It's a very sad and difficult summer, but we have an amazing wedding in September. We buy a house on the last day of the year. We take a huge tree down after it tried to fall on the house. I chop wood for the remainder of the spring and summer.

33) I continue to periodically chop wood... thankless task. I legally change my name. I become an expectant aunt. We get some civil recognition of our relationship- BUT not MARRIAGE... no, no, SWEET LORD NO- please don't call it marriage... it might make other marriages suddenly invalid if the state of Connecticut says we're married. (True confession: when the police aren't around, I call it "marriage;" and most folks I know- despite the VERY CLEAR federal law [HR 3396] indicating that marriage needs to be protected from people like us- call her my "wife" ;)


Sunday, March 12, 2006

More poems

It probably surprises most of my friends that I go to church these days. For a long long time I've been against organized religion because of what I saw of it in the media. In October we started going to the Unitarian Universalist Church of West Hartford, and my ideas about church changed for the better. If you're ever interested in some uplifting and inspiring sermons you should read a few of Rev. Jan's.

Today the service included this poem by Mary Oliver...

The Terns

The birds shrug off
the slant air,
they plunge into the sea
and vanish
under the glassy edges
of the water,
and then come back,
as white as snow,
shaking themselves,
shaking the little silver fish,
crying out
in their own language,
voices like rough bells –
it’s wonderful
and it happens whenever
the tide starts its gushing
journey back, every morning
or afternoon.
This is a poem
about death,
about the heart blanching
in its folds of shadows because it knows
someday it will be
the fish and the wave
and no longer itself –
it will be those white wings,
flying in and out
of the darkness
but not knowing it –
this is a poem about loving
the world and everything in it:
the self, the perpetual muscle,
the passage in and out, the bristling
swing of the sea.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Show over...

My girls basketball team fought hard today but we were outmatched, and they lost. I was more bummed than I thought I would be. It was a great season and I'm already putting together all the practices and drills for next year.

Now it's on to non-stop ESPN watching for women's NCAA March Madness... hooray!

Reading about buddhism...

The bud
stands for all things,
even for those things that don't flower,
for everything flowers, from within, of self-blessing,
though sometimes it is necessary
to reteach a thing its lovelieness,
to put a hand on the brow
of the flower,
and retell it in words and in touch,
it is lovely
until it flowers again from within, of self-blessing

-Galway Kinnel

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Doctor J.




Can you believe they let this dude into medical school?!? It's true!!! Our big, brave Alaskan warrior, got dressed up in a (kick-ass) suit and tie and dazzled the admission committee at UW. In typical Zwart/ Tierney fashion, there was someone from Yellow Springs, Ohio (population: 3,761) participating in his group interview.

It's not like he needed this extra connection to get in, but this type of luck is the EXACT reason that I sometimes want to raise my fist to the sky and shout "Damn you!" to the reality show that didn't pick us to race around the world with J on our team. We love you, brother. Enjoy the next 7 to 10 years of hazing! Call if you need a nurse to help you understand any of the more complex elements of the healthcare delivery system!

By the way, we are very excited for you and proud of you too! It's like I've always said, "You're the bomb!!!"

Monday, March 06, 2006

Life is better than a sitcom pilot



This is just about the greatest thing I have seen all year!!!

You asked for it...

Well, this one's kind of grainy, but I couldn't get that close to her with all the media attention.



I don't know how I'm going to get a picture of her losing her voice next Sunday, though.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Championship basketball

While the world (including me) prepares for March Madness, my junior high basketball team is creating its own madness. My girls won today 39-15 in their final regular season game to take sole posession of 2nd place. Saturday are the semis and, if we win, we will likely play a seemingly unstoppable team on Sunday.

Something tells me I may lose my voice sometime on Sunday.

The Lord's Day

The perfect excuse to put up the quote I recently heard that stopped my head from spinning for a few minutes, and has helped me to chill out a little since then:
"You are not a human being having a spiritual experience. You are a spiritual being having a human experience." (Author unknown)

Saturday, March 04, 2006

Evolution

There is almost always a din of noise inside my head. It has something to do with always trying to get more done in less time and not spending enough time relaxing. Strangely enough, I found a quote that makes me stop (if only for a few minutes) in an article about evolution v. intelligent design:

"Organisms aren't trying to match any 'independently given pattern': evolution has no goal, and the history of life isn't trying to get anywhere." (H. Allen Orr)

Maybe I shouldn't be trying to get anywhere either.

28 sentences

A dear friend from college did an exercise on her blog where she described each year of her life in one sentence (or a little more). My attempt:

1. I was born in Albuquerque, New Mexico at Kirtland AirForce Base where both of my parents were stationed.
2. We move to Tucson, Arizona and my little brother Joshua is born on the second to last day of the year.
3. We move to Ohio where my dad is stationed at Wright Patterson AirForce Base.
4. My mom tells me that little girls who can't tie their shoes aren't allowed to go to kindergarten and within seconds I become a world-class shoe tyer.
5. The wonderful world of academics begins with Mrs. Grimshaw's class and I learn that a pencil is not a circle, it's a cylinder.
6. On to first grade and reading, and my dad gets transferred to Los Angeles.
7. Second grade, Mrs. Wertz's class, had probably what was my first migraine and threw up all over my spelling book. Thad was the kid in front of me and he was not pleased.
8. My step-sister Mattie is born.
9. We move to Yellow Springs, a hippie oasis in the middle of Ohio, I spend nearly the entire summer at my grandmother's in NY, every minute of it in the pool with my cousins.
10. 4th grade, new school, new short hair cut, favorite outfit ever: purple jeans with black splatter pegged with blue sock on one foot, purple on the other, pulled up over the jeans, of course.
11. Recess is a bore, I ask for extra reading and math work so I can stay inside with the teacher.
12. Dad moves back to Ohio, and my brother and I help him pick out a house.
13. I go away to Friends Music Camp for a month, and it turns out to be the place that affects me for the rest of my life. Several amazing friends are gained while playing piano and singing every day for a month.
14. I hate social school and love academics.
15. I get my first job at the Organic Grocery and love every minute of it.
16. I learn to like, maybe even love, tofu, and I join the volunteer fire department and EMS service where I spend every free moment, I'm also the captain of my basketball team.
17. Brown accepted me into a summer program for science geeks where I meet Hadi and Anne, who still inspire me and make me laugh nearly 12 years later.
18. College. Smith College. Freedom and knowledge and women.
19. I give up playing basketball in college, one of the most heart-breaking decisions I've ever made.
20. I learn spanish from an amazing professor whom I still adore.
21. Graduation from college: I cry when I drive away with my car packed to the gills, but I cannot have stayed any longer. It's the perfect breakup. I also go sky diving for the first time.
22. The first year of grad school begins and I can barely force myself to go in to a patient's room.
23. The first year of grad school ends and just 30 days later the second year begins. I also start dating Tracy, my future wife.
24. Tracy moves in and the last year of grad school starts. My spanish improves exponentially with clinical time.
25. I land my first job and feel exhausted for the first 6 months straight, but have the opportunity to learn from two amazing doctors.
26. I get engaged after seeing a UConn women's basketball game (go ahead, laugh).
27. I get married in front of 200 of our closest friends and family, and have the best day of my life (so far). My grandmother and Tracy's grandfather both pass away after long illnesses. We buy a house in less than 4 weeks and move in with the help of some seriously dedicated family members and friends.
28. We get a civil union on the first day they are legal in the state of Connecticut.

From backpacks to Burberry

My parents are in town. They come to visit us a few times a year and generally get roped into helping fix something or other on our house. Or, for those of you who have seen it, creating a masterful garden that nearly grows and prunes itself, merely creating the illusion that you yourself are doing anything to help it. (This garden is no joke: it even blooms at seemingly preset times during the summer so there are no weeks without some kind of new flower) But this trip was planned so they could see a concert in Boston. My parents adore a group called Hesperion XXI. The last time I heard this group it was during a movie called Tous les matins du monde, which was set sometime in the 17th century. Needless to say, I was happy to drive them to Boston, then find a place to sit and get a drink while they went to the concert.

After several generous offers, however, Tracy and I decided to give it a try. It could not have been a better decision. The concert was phenomenal. The instruments were interesting, the vocals were superb, and the crowd LOVED it. Which brings me to the explanation of this entry's title. There were hundreds of people crammed into the Jesuit Urban Center on a Friday night. It was bitterly cold and windy. And yet, there were an amazing assortment of types of people excitedly running for their seats. There were people with cloth backpacks that I swear had hand-sown patches on them, people with coke-bottle glasses, people with more hair on their face than I have on my head (and that's saying something), people speaking several different languages that resemble Spanish, and people with Burberry scarves and long expensive black coats that were dropped off in front by a limo. It was a truly amazing sight.

The music was grouped into four-song packets, and the audience could barely contain themselves between them. There is something very inspiring about being in a place where there are nearly a thousand people sitting on the edges of their seats and begging to be given a chance to applaud.

Also, note to self: don't knock new (well, old) music til you've tried it.