It' sounds like a Tuberculosis ward in here, but the state of the family is strong...

Our kids are at their Sat AM events: Jake with Katy to dance, Milo with Papa to gymnastics. I have an hour to clean the house, but first give you a 10 second snap shot:

1) After suffering 6 weeks with a wet, productive, hacking cough Milo has been diagnosed with an ear infection. Three days on antibiotics and the cough is remarkably improved.

2) Jake has started asking every morning, "Can I have a little coffee?" which is his way of asking for a cough drop.

3) Yesterday I went to a "minute clinic" b/c I don't have a PCP (terrible) and I couldn't take my worsening cough and cold anymore. I got myself on some antibiotics and some allergy medication as well. I'm still an allergy denial-ist even in the face of mounting evidence that I have in fact developed seasonal allergies well into the 4th decade of my life

4) Katy caught the kids playing "We're late...we' re late... We're late..." with each other in the living room the other day. (Eye roll). I guess there are worse things we could be imitated for...

5) I gave my notice at work and will be changing jobs this month... Lots of anxiety to get us to this point and the next 2 week are going to be totally full THROTTLE wrapping up 7 plus years of unfinished TO DO lists, but when the dust settles, I'll write a little more about it...

Overheard in the darkness

It's 4:30 am.
It's pitch black in our room.
I wake up to the sounds of the familiar pitter-patter, pitter-pat.
Lately, he walks right by me around to katy's side of the bed.
That's what he did this morning...

JB: Mama wanna see something?
KT: (trying to wake up) what?!?
JB: I wanna show you something.
KT: huh? you want to show me something?
JB: yes. (pause. pause. Mama and Mommy can't really move yet. I'm trying to get up so that she can be off the hook with whatever he wants to show her... I imagine it might be a set of wet sheets and blankets.)
JB: (waiting patiently, trying to entice her) Wanna come see?
KT: (starting to get up) What? What do you want to show me?
JB: (He is insistent and won't tip his hand) Come see...
(pause. I am awake, but it is like I am paralyzed. I cannot figure out how to come out of sleep enough to move.)
(pause)
(pause)
KT: Stars?!? you see the stars? Are you trying to show me the stars?
KT: (in the sweetest, most innocent, and most wide-eyed voice you can imagine) Aren't they beautiful?
KT: Yes... they are. Thank you for showing me.
(sigh)

Conversations overheard

July 1, 2010:
At a Dayton Dragon's (minor league) game, JB, still awake in the 9th inning: "Where's the um'pirate?"

July 5, 2010:
Out for a walk with JB in the stroller... Neither of us has spoken for a few minutes. Out of the blue he announces: "Bibbity Boppity BACON".

July 11, 2010: JB is falling asleep in the car after many hours of swimming and playing. His eyes are lolling around in his skull and I say to him, "Are you okay? Do you need anything?" He blinks a few times and says, "Can we hear some Lady Gaga?"

We stop for gas a few minutes later and there is an amazing double rainbow. It is the first time we have the opportunity to show him a real rainbow. Katy and I pull JB out of the car and point to it, using various clouds, trees, and an airplane as points of reference.

Moms: Do you see it? It is right there?
JB: yes (he's looking in the wrong direction)
Moms: Look up there, see the colors?
JB: yes
Moms (trying to point him to it) see the jet? it's about to fly through the rainbow. Do you see the rainbow?
JB: (not looking high enough in the sky to see the rainbow) Yes. I see it
Moms: (emphatically repeating themselves)
JB: Um, can I just look at that dump truck?
Moms bring their gaze to the horizon and see a huge, orange, municipal, dump truck parked about 200 feet away and start laughing, hysterically.

This morning, in our kitchen, JB has his hands in fists:
JB: can you clean my hands off
Me: sure.
JB: (Handing me an empty banana peel) They have some of this carcass on them I need to clean off.

This evening while waiting for the tub to fill, a naked JB is sort of quietly muttering to himself: "blah, blah, blah... blah, blah, blah"... I can't really hear him and lean in for a better listen. He sounds like an actor patiently rehearsing lines. With a gentle inflection, he intones: "I'm not mad at you, I'm not angry, I'm just explaining... I'm not angry... I'm not mad, I'm just explaining..." I run, silently giggling to get Katy. She says, "Where did he pick that up?" I roll my eyes as she has said this to him 2 times this evening alone... And last week when I caught him considering the dimensions of an electrical outlet and shouted him away from it, I had to write a convincing jingle off-the-cuff with these very words to stop the kid from sobbing.

NOT TO BE OUTDONE...
ML: (several times over the last few weeks) "DA!"
"Da-da!"
"Na-na!"
"GA!"
"Laaaaaaa" and "AaaaaaaRrraaaaaaarrrrr" (in a perfect imitation of a drunken Barney from the Simpsons.)

So effing amazing... these kids are!

The (tiny) Godfather

For about a 1/2 a year, we have been getting JB to lend us his ear by telling him, "I have a secret I want to tell you."

We tell him we have a secret and he brings his ear dutifully near the secret-bearer's mouth.

Then one of his moms whispers the secret: "I love you."

His response varies.
Sometimes, he giggles and says, "No, mommy."
Sometimes he nods and says, "yeah."
Sometimes he thrills us with a return whisper: "I love you too."

We've done it over and over again and sometimes he even tells us the secret unprompted.

Tonight, JB told his brother, "ML, I have a secret I want to tell you..."

I wasn't there, but Katy told me... She waited, excitedly. She smiled at the adorableness she knew she was about to witness...

JB leaned his lips close to his 4 month old brother's ear and whispered:

"Big. Brother."

(Baaaaaaaahahahah ahhahahahhahahhaha.)

Not exactly sure his point, but it seemed like it might have been some kind of warning.

--------------------------
UPDATE: He's done it a few more times now, and the secret JB seems to be whispering is:
"I'm your big brother."

Overheard at the community health center

I'm walking through the lobby at my job, on the way from one side of the center to the other. I'm wearing my "business casual" with my ID around my neck, and a patient waiting in line locks eyes with me. She seems very excited to see me, though I'm pretty sure that we've never spoken to each other before...

Lady: HI!!!!
Me: How are you doing?

I keep walking as my rhetorical question has gone unanswered.

"HEY!" She has shouted this in an apparent attempt to stop me. I turn toward her and she pauses for a second as if she is not sure what she wants to say to me. "When is father's day?" She inquires innocently.

I stop, a little confused by the question, "Um..."

"The 6th of June? The 12th? Something like that, right?"

"Yeah, around there, probably the second Sunday..." I've slowed down my pace, but am still about to pass her on my way out of the waiting room.

"I'm just here getting condoms." she shouts to my back

"Oh..." I reply weakly, twisting around toward her b/c I didn't realize until this second that our conversation was continuing. "Good..."

She pauses long enough so that I start again to walk away and she sort of yells after me, "I come every month..."

I stop, turn, and am standing, looking at her from about 6 or 7 feet away.

"THEY'RE for my sons..." she continues, "15 and 17 years old... and they use them too..."

Pause. Pause. Pause

I reply, "Well that's good." She says nothing else.

I nod at her. She nods at me. Once again, I assume the conversation is over and turn to go. When I am another 10 feet away, she calls after me...

"SAFE SEX, RIGHT?!?" I turn back. She stage whispers this next part for no apparent reason, "SAAAAAFE SEX."

I nod. Then she retells the story to the person in line behind her.
I walk away having no idea what just happened.