Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Introduction of "The Bean"

It's been hard blogging lately for several reasons:
1) Extreme Exhaustion
2) Feeling pensive, not witty
3) Don't know how to chit chat without revealing the big secret.

The blog is about to change.
Life is about to change...

There are still people that we haven't told in person who we feel we should tell in person, but I can't really keep it in anymore. So if you are finding out about this on the blog, and you are inclined to think that you should have gotten a phone call or a personal visit, I apologize. In terms of an explanation and a show of remorse, I can only refer you to reason #1 at the top of the page... I am a very tired young woman.

Actually, I'm not tired so much as pregnant.
There. I said it.
Just about 12 weeks along. Due around October 11th. Queasy and tired, but otherwise doing great. Both moms are very excited and "the bean" as we have begun referring to our newly formed fetus is... well s/he is not saying much yet, but my uterus is stretching and the journey begins.

About this time last year, Katy and I were contemplating an IVF cycle after seven failed attempts at insemination with frozen donor sperm. I was seeing a very kind and adorable infertility doctor who put me on clomid and progesterone, and at least once time, injectibles to drive my ovulation. I was getting vaginal ultrasounds 4-7 times per month and blood drawn more often. It didn't seem that bad at the time, but it was a roller coaster of angst. We took some time off from the planning to put our house back in order and around New Year's 2007 started discussing a plan to continue the baby-making quest.

We knew we had one more shot on ice and thought we could A) use that last dose for IVF which had an excellent chance of success for someone like me with supposedly healthy eggs and no obvious "real" infertility issues. Or we could B) Do one more insemination cycle with tall, skinny, anonymous donor boy (tsadb) and then look for some new - hopefully more talented - tadpoles.

We were about to call the cute MD, when we decided on a cheaper solution: Were we to "liberate the swim team" and give it our best shot at home, we could... you know... Do it the "old fashioned way"... in the bedroom... the... um... proverbial and stereotypical "turkey baster" method.

I never thought it would work. And clearly neither did Katy, b/c she let me drink for two consecutive weekends until day-12, post-insemination, I started to feel a little... nauseous.
Seven to ten positive pee sticks later we were like, W.T.F?!? Who could have written this episode and expected the public to buy it???

At that point, my wife started to strut a little. I mean, seriously, can you blame her? Sorry Dr-cutie-pie with all the fancy technology... my girl knows her way around a cervix.

blink.
blink.
blink.

Anyway, we threw this annoying tease out there early in the month. What they have in common is that those are the foods that baby center.com uses to compare the size of an embryo to in the 5th, 6th, 7th, and 8th week of gestational life.

FAQs:
1) No, we do not know the gender - it's too early.
2) No, we are probably not going to find out the gender until the delivery
3) Yes, really.
4) Yes, we realize this will make "shopping and decorating" more difficult
5) No, we do not have a name picked out.
6) Yes, our parents and families are very excited.

Will keep you posted! (obviously.)

PS- if you run into my dad's mom, just be aware, I haven't gotten over there to tell her yet, and she doesn't have internet access... And she doesn't know I'm gay... Just kidding, of course she knows I'm gay- she was at the wedding... but she's not much of a cook and doesn't know a thing about turkey basters. I think I might just let her think the doctor was successful... hmm, lots of things to figure out still...

4 comments:

Grand Marnier said...

seriously--a TURKEY BASTER?? How was this detail kept from the Orlops??

Also, thanks for clarifying that earlier post. Had nursing school not turned my brain to much, it would have irked me to no end that I didn't know why you posted that. As it was, I didn't immediately remember what you were referring to... Sigh. I think that my neurons are starting to escape the prison that is my cranium and go on vacation.

And obviously, congrats--we are SO excited!

Tracy said...

no... not "seriously".
Turkey Baster is a euphemism for the more clinical: "syringe luer-loc'ed to an intra-uterine catheter."

But that sort of takes some of the poetry out of it. Doesn't it?

dl004d said...

Ooooh, Clomid! You could commiserate with Barry Bonds (his Clomid habit was Marnie's favorite revelation from the book "Game of Shadows"). Meanwhile, congratulations! Also, "feeling pensive, not witty" is not a fit excuse to stay away from blogging. We readers enjoy your thoughtful musings and mystery food quizzes.

Smith College Class of '99 said...

Congrats you two! Very very exciting!