To bring you a terrorist attack...
Two bombs were detonated at the finish line of the Boston Marathon today...
But I want to tell you a couple of better stories...
- Last week, Katy's parents were here and ran the boys around like thoroughbred animals. Sometimes they were so tired that at dinner their eyes would drift to one side and their heads drift to another and they would almost fall over (I'm speaking of the boys, but the grannies were also similarly, joyfully worn out).
- Saturday was Gram'ma Bella's 89th birthday party (at the local Italian place we've nicknamed: 'Spooch"). We dressed our boys up in their cute, cute, cute 4 piece suits and had such a wonderful meal with the extended family. During that time, my great aunt approached both Katy and me separately to let us know that friends of hers were complaining that "no one dresses their kids up any more" and then she added: "But I tell them, my nieces- they dress their boys up so nice!" Katy and I were tickled. I love it so much when older relatives get it... "my nieces" (sigh).
- After Gram's party, Jake went to a Karate-themed birthday party and was so Thrilled when he broke a board in half with his bare hand. He said to Katy: "Maybe there was some kind of little line in it that I can't see that made it easier to break". She replied: "I think you just aimed right through it and broke it all yourself." And then he kind of beamed.
- Later that night, my sister and I took all our kids to see the Croods. It was Milo's first time in a movie theater and when he walked into the lobby he gasped like he was little orphan Annie seeing the Warbuck's mansion for the first time, and told us, "I've never been HERE before." We sat all through the long, loud, cute movie and about 5 minutes before the end a VERY TIRED Milo turned to me and whispered/whined: "When do we get to pick out a movie?"
Me: Sweetie, this is the Movie... we are AT the movie.
Milo: NO, the REAL movie
Me: (laughing with love and empathy) no. really... this is LITERALLY a "real" movie
- Sunday, we hiked up sleeping Giant park Tower Trail (3.2 miles round trip). Both boys did AWESOME. Jake did the entire hike- up and down all on his own two feet (it's probably his 6th time on the trail- first time that he walked all on his own without being carried even ONE INCH!). Milo did ALL THE WAY UP and MORE than HALF the way down only getting carried on my shoulders for about 10 minutes. I was seriously, so proud.
Showing posts with label Current Events. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Current Events. Show all posts
Monday, April 15, 2013
Thursday, March 14, 2013
DST= I'm so tired
And by that i mean, it's nice to get that extra daylight and all, but really- the time shift 4 days ago has messed up these kids' sleep cycles. I don't know how or why it happens. It doesn't make any logical sense, but everyone is all coo-coo for coco puffs at bed time and all night long... And getting out of the house on time in the morning is a joke.
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
If one more person says, "guns don't kill people..." I'm gonna lose my mind
Six days until Christmas...
I am gifting you with this "anti-gun" rant (though no where in here does it say we should ban all guns) that I crafted to post on someone else's FB page. I am heartbroken and I am mad as hell.
I will concede that "people kill people" if the other side concedes that the singular purpose of guns is to extinguish life or create a credible threat that you are willing to extinguish life (Not true about cars, or alcohol, or knives or rocks or fists or even explosives).
I will NOT apologize for wanting to lock up guns before wanting to lock up every person that is or could become mentally unstable.
The youngest and most vulnerable members of our society are unable to protect themselves and/or resist the allure of the gun culture that has been allowed to flourish.
People are addicted to guns.
People have fallen in love with guns.
People think guns, even MORE guns can fix everything.
We are not learning our lesson, and we are living through the history that we will repeat until we learn that lesson: An unchecked gun-culture results in the unacceptable slaughter of innocents - sometimes en mass, sometimes one or two at a time.
I disagree that this is impossible... "Stopping gun violence is impossible". I completely disagree.
Nothing is impossible...
Seriously.
"Impossible" is just what people say when they don't want to do the work to figure out a tough problem...
"Impossible" is the message that gun manufacturers have spent untold dollars to imprint on our collective psyche. Whispering into the wind, while shouting from the mountain until a made-up deterrent becomes fact.
Just sit there,
No need to stir...
This is impossible.
This country undid slavery.
This country reversed the prohibition of a women's right to vote.
This country invented child labor laws, and airplanes, and landed a man on the moon.
Do you think those things seemed possible or even plausible before they happened? Do you think that was easy? No, but there was a moral imperative, a call to action, people brave enough to look like fools for a cause they believed in.
In our lifetimes, drunk driving and smoking in public has become both legally and socially unacceptable. Ask someone in the 50s or 60s or 70s if they thought there would be a socially supported, legal mandate to forbid smoking in bars?!? [And imagine... Second hand smoke only kills people gradually over a long period of time.]
There is no rational reason for military style semi-automatic weapons to be circulating among the general population. A woman on FB yesterday was writing about how every citizen has the constitutionally protected right to possess enough firepower to overthrow the government. (Ignoring for a moment the counter-argument that starts by pointing out that every white landowner also had the constitutionally protected right to own people of a different race as pets) That is an insane postulation based on the outdated ideology of a group of rebels (our forefathers) that unyoked themselves from the largest EMPIRE of the time.
Currently, WE OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT EVERY FEW YEARS by VOTING and the fact that not a shot gets fired and no one gets murdered is one of the true reasons to get choked up with pride about being an American.
Police officers and soldiers are professionals and they get to keep and use any guns they are provided with to do their jobs. But the argument that the average citizen is safer and can protect his/her family with a gun does not hold true. People who live in homes with guns are more than 4 times more likely to be injured or killed by a gun. And it's not usually the "gun-owner" that gets hurt. But there are countless accidents.
And then there are the incidents of domestic violence that would have been bad but because there was a gun available, turned tragic. People DO die in knife fights and are killed by fists and boots and plates being thrown across the room but it is easier to limp away and survive when guns are not involved.
Also, 30 bullets in a clip??? Nope. I don't care who is holding a gun with 30 bullets. Even a "good guy" is dangerous with that kind of fire power. 30 bullets in clip that can be fired at a rate of 6 shots per second, why should any private citizen have access to that? Why do we think that is a right?!?
I have loaded and fired a single shot musket, it's like 3 shots a minute at most. And the entire time you are reloading that fast, you have to focus a bit and are vulnerable to counter attack. I think it was Thomas Jefferson who said about the Bushmaster AR-15,
"Are you people fucking crazy?!?"
We are a nation of 310,000,000 guns. But this is not irreversible or impossible to fix. I am shocked to see people say, "it can't be fixed"... It CAN be fixed. Australia was an island of convicted criminals; a nation overwrought with guns. The govt changed laws, instituted a buy-back and the results included a 40% decline in the murder rate.
We need to decide to do something and we need to FIX this. We can either make our babies bulletproof, or we can fix this.
We can either lock up anyone that is mentally ill or has the potential to crack up (And by the way... You know who I'm most worried about losing their minds right now??? Those surviving teachers, and kids and parents, and first responders from Newtown, CT... please someone make sure they don't have access to guns on some of the cold, lonely nights coming up ahead for them)
or we can FIX this...
Let hunters have their rifles for hunting. And most Americans support handgun ownership with guns that hold 6-10 bullets, but if gun advocates continue to defend ownership of indefensible amounts of firepower:
assault riffles
endless ammo
one person owning dozens of guns that can be bought through the internet with no regulation
gun shows that do not follow the regulatory rules-
I think there will really be a public outcry and backlash...
I hope there will be.
People do not have a right to have whatever they want at the expense of the safety of the general public. At the expense of the health and safety of children. You can't smoke in a TIGFridays, but you can pack heat and carry enough bullets to instantly erase 2 or 3 tables of families if you feel physically threatened?!?
We can fix this. We need to fix this... We should have fixed this already.
I am gifting you with this "anti-gun" rant (though no where in here does it say we should ban all guns) that I crafted to post on someone else's FB page. I am heartbroken and I am mad as hell.
I will concede that "people kill people" if the other side concedes that the singular purpose of guns is to extinguish life or create a credible threat that you are willing to extinguish life (Not true about cars, or alcohol, or knives or rocks or fists or even explosives).
I will NOT apologize for wanting to lock up guns before wanting to lock up every person that is or could become mentally unstable.
The youngest and most vulnerable members of our society are unable to protect themselves and/or resist the allure of the gun culture that has been allowed to flourish.
People are addicted to guns.
People have fallen in love with guns.
People think guns, even MORE guns can fix everything.
We are not learning our lesson, and we are living through the history that we will repeat until we learn that lesson: An unchecked gun-culture results in the unacceptable slaughter of innocents - sometimes en mass, sometimes one or two at a time.
I disagree that this is impossible... "Stopping gun violence is impossible". I completely disagree.
Nothing is impossible...
Seriously.
"Impossible" is just what people say when they don't want to do the work to figure out a tough problem...
"Impossible" is the message that gun manufacturers have spent untold dollars to imprint on our collective psyche. Whispering into the wind, while shouting from the mountain until a made-up deterrent becomes fact.
Just sit there,
No need to stir...
This is impossible.
This country undid slavery.
This country reversed the prohibition of a women's right to vote.
This country invented child labor laws, and airplanes, and landed a man on the moon.
Do you think those things seemed possible or even plausible before they happened? Do you think that was easy? No, but there was a moral imperative, a call to action, people brave enough to look like fools for a cause they believed in.
In our lifetimes, drunk driving and smoking in public has become both legally and socially unacceptable. Ask someone in the 50s or 60s or 70s if they thought there would be a socially supported, legal mandate to forbid smoking in bars?!? [And imagine... Second hand smoke only kills people gradually over a long period of time.]
There is no rational reason for military style semi-automatic weapons to be circulating among the general population. A woman on FB yesterday was writing about how every citizen has the constitutionally protected right to possess enough firepower to overthrow the government. (Ignoring for a moment the counter-argument that starts by pointing out that every white landowner also had the constitutionally protected right to own people of a different race as pets) That is an insane postulation based on the outdated ideology of a group of rebels (our forefathers) that unyoked themselves from the largest EMPIRE of the time.
Currently, WE OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT EVERY FEW YEARS by VOTING and the fact that not a shot gets fired and no one gets murdered is one of the true reasons to get choked up with pride about being an American.
Police officers and soldiers are professionals and they get to keep and use any guns they are provided with to do their jobs. But the argument that the average citizen is safer and can protect his/her family with a gun does not hold true. People who live in homes with guns are more than 4 times more likely to be injured or killed by a gun. And it's not usually the "gun-owner" that gets hurt. But there are countless accidents.
And then there are the incidents of domestic violence that would have been bad but because there was a gun available, turned tragic. People DO die in knife fights and are killed by fists and boots and plates being thrown across the room but it is easier to limp away and survive when guns are not involved.
Also, 30 bullets in a clip??? Nope. I don't care who is holding a gun with 30 bullets. Even a "good guy" is dangerous with that kind of fire power. 30 bullets in clip that can be fired at a rate of 6 shots per second, why should any private citizen have access to that? Why do we think that is a right?!?
I have loaded and fired a single shot musket, it's like 3 shots a minute at most. And the entire time you are reloading that fast, you have to focus a bit and are vulnerable to counter attack. I think it was Thomas Jefferson who said about the Bushmaster AR-15,
"Are you people fucking crazy?!?"
We are a nation of 310,000,000 guns. But this is not irreversible or impossible to fix. I am shocked to see people say, "it can't be fixed"... It CAN be fixed. Australia was an island of convicted criminals; a nation overwrought with guns. The govt changed laws, instituted a buy-back and the results included a 40% decline in the murder rate.
We need to decide to do something and we need to FIX this. We can either make our babies bulletproof, or we can fix this.
We can either lock up anyone that is mentally ill or has the potential to crack up (And by the way... You know who I'm most worried about losing their minds right now??? Those surviving teachers, and kids and parents, and first responders from Newtown, CT... please someone make sure they don't have access to guns on some of the cold, lonely nights coming up ahead for them)
or we can FIX this...
Let hunters have their rifles for hunting. And most Americans support handgun ownership with guns that hold 6-10 bullets, but if gun advocates continue to defend ownership of indefensible amounts of firepower:
assault riffles
endless ammo
one person owning dozens of guns that can be bought through the internet with no regulation
gun shows that do not follow the regulatory rules-
I think there will really be a public outcry and backlash...
I hope there will be.
People do not have a right to have whatever they want at the expense of the safety of the general public. At the expense of the health and safety of children. You can't smoke in a TIGFridays, but you can pack heat and carry enough bullets to instantly erase 2 or 3 tables of families if you feel physically threatened?!?
We can fix this. We need to fix this... We should have fixed this already.
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Sunday, September 11, 2011
I'm on the edge of Glory
For those of you that don't know, that is a Lady Gaga song... Edge of Glory - a song that our family is a bit obsessed with right now. I have an entire essay (vaguely outlined) inside me about how much I respect and adore Lady Gaga, and how if I can feel this way (as an older, mature, fairly "formed" female) I imagine you can multiply that by a million and barely score the surface of the desperate adoration experienced by millions of 12-20 year old women.
But that's a story for another day. Currently, I live with a (3-days-shy of) 2 year old who may simultaneously be Lady Gaga's biggest, youngest fan... and the ruin of her in my eyes. Milo*** won't let it go. He loves her. Her NEEDS her. And the little monster drives a hard bargain. When it comes to nagging us to play her music, he has the attention span and tenacity of Jane Goodall in the jungle. All he cares to listen to is Lady Gaga. And he is insistent. And I know you are thinking, "How can he know??? What does he really know about it???" But he does and he gets pissed if we try to listen to any other music. He acts heartbroken as if all other music is a compilation of dissonant chords and harmful to his dance-party way of life. For now, his parents are equally stubborn, and when we can't take another 50 rounds or 50 miles of Lady Gaga at the audio helm, we are getting used to listening to all other music with Milo screaming in the background:
LADY GAGA... LADY GAGA... PLEASE, MOMMY, MAMA... NO... NOW... GAGA...GAGA...WAAAAAAAAAHHH
(It goes on and on).
So, the title of the post also relates to my mood these days. I'm a little off-kilter; not sleeping enough; doing my best to balance. Finding myself needing to write more, but not writing. Finding myself needing to eat less, but eating like cRaZy. Finding myself wanting to exercise, but not turning the machine into high gear.
Despite what you just read, I'm pretty damn content with this life we are living right now. I am full of gratitude. I am amazed by my wife and our sons and basking in their glow. BUT... I am experiencing a fog of apprehension, and that familiar angst that comes with waiting too intently for the other shoe to drop.
The summer is fading, but it has been quite wonderful. Despite the fact that we experienced an earthquake (my first) and a tropical storm in the span of 5 days, we've had tremendous weather.
We’ve spent a lot of time this summer swimming and playing (and eating food) with friends and family… Some of that food has been seasonally fresh and healthy, and some of it char-grilled, processed, fried, and yummy (but very much the opposite of “good for you”- unless you are counting the “good for the soul” excuse that I keep coming back to.) We've had some terrific vacations: Ohio in July, Rhode Island in August...
This last week, though has found me in a bit of an angst-y, Don't-look-down-you've got-too far to fall melancholy.
But that's a story for another day. Currently, I live with a (3-days-shy of) 2 year old who may simultaneously be Lady Gaga's biggest, youngest fan... and the ruin of her in my eyes. Milo*** won't let it go. He loves her. Her NEEDS her. And the little monster drives a hard bargain. When it comes to nagging us to play her music, he has the attention span and tenacity of Jane Goodall in the jungle. All he cares to listen to is Lady Gaga. And he is insistent. And I know you are thinking, "How can he know??? What does he really know about it???" But he does and he gets pissed if we try to listen to any other music. He acts heartbroken as if all other music is a compilation of dissonant chords and harmful to his dance-party way of life. For now, his parents are equally stubborn, and when we can't take another 50 rounds or 50 miles of Lady Gaga at the audio helm, we are getting used to listening to all other music with Milo screaming in the background:
LADY GAGA... LADY GAGA... PLEASE, MOMMY, MAMA... NO... NOW... GAGA...GAGA...WAAAAAAAAAHHH
(It goes on and on).
So, the title of the post also relates to my mood these days. I'm a little off-kilter; not sleeping enough; doing my best to balance. Finding myself needing to write more, but not writing. Finding myself needing to eat less, but eating like cRaZy. Finding myself wanting to exercise, but not turning the machine into high gear.
Despite what you just read, I'm pretty damn content with this life we are living right now. I am full of gratitude. I am amazed by my wife and our sons and basking in their glow. BUT... I am experiencing a fog of apprehension, and that familiar angst that comes with waiting too intently for the other shoe to drop.
The summer is fading, but it has been quite wonderful. Despite the fact that we experienced an earthquake (my first) and a tropical storm in the span of 5 days, we've had tremendous weather.
We’ve spent a lot of time this summer swimming and playing (and eating food) with friends and family… Some of that food has been seasonally fresh and healthy, and some of it char-grilled, processed, fried, and yummy (but very much the opposite of “good for you”- unless you are counting the “good for the soul” excuse that I keep coming back to.) We've had some terrific vacations: Ohio in July, Rhode Island in August...
This last week, though has found me in a bit of an angst-y, Don't-look-down-you've got-too far to fall melancholy.
To be fair, it's about to be autumn and I have a history of angst-y autumns at various times in my life. At this latitude, in this hemisphere in September and October, there is a very specific change in the angle of sunlight. The time of sunset sprints back toward the afternoon. It is still “summer” during the day, but the temperature plummets 20 degrees by a few hours after dark. You can close your eyes and smell the air (before more than a dozen leaves have changed color) and know you are breathing the first breaths of autumn. You could be in 80 degree sunshine, but know that shifting glare on the horizon means that the summer warmth will dissipate after dark.
Today is September 11th. I just finished watching the season finale of True Blood (a totally f'd up TV show that I can't quit) and about 2 hours of 9/11 "never forget" coverage. And I can't help but wonder, who is that slogan for? Isn't forgetting required a little in order to heal. I got my first glimpse of the WTC memorial and I just sort of burst into tears- it was the visual of the pools- water plunging down into the footprint of the original towers. I couldn't help but think of those people that jumped. I'm not one to get overly sentimental, but something about firefighters dying will always cause me to come a little unglued I think.
It's not just Sept 11th...
Last week, a 4 1/2 year old boy (a friend of a friend's kid) drowned in a neighbor's pool. The parents are a lesbian couple. The kids were with a sitter at the time of the accident. Feel the weight of that devastation for a moment.
Next week, the trial is about to begin for the second man who was caught in the act of, and then confessed to, robbing, pummeling, sexually assaulting, and murdering our friends one summer night in their own home FOUR years ago. But until the end of this trial we have to keep saying he "allegedly" did these things. His team of lawyers seems even more desperate and untrustworthy as he has shown himself to be. I know they have their job to do. But this guy is the one that is going show himself to be some kind of real SOB and I know you are going to have to put up with a little ranting from me in the coming weeks...
Then, there's Jake*** and Milo*** with their impressive, end-of-summer tan lines, and their ever-expansive brains and sharp observations of the world, and their little perfect bodies growing out of toddler-hood and baby-hood respectively. I know they are still young, but they are already growing up. And it's hard to imagine how we will continue to keep them safe when we know so much about how things can go wrong in the world.
There was a festival in town this weekend- food, fun, crafts, music (sorry, Milo, that the Marching Band, did NOT have any Gaga). One tent set up by a local insurance company was producing "kid ID kits". While you waited there, they took photos and fingerprinted your children. I wanted to do this because I can't imagine anything scarier than needing this data and not actually having it available. The entire time I was under this tent (probably 20 minutes for both boys) I felt like I might burst into tears. It was so anxiety producing to complete a kit that would help us if one of the boys disappeared, that it was actually hard not to mutter "never mind" and just run away from there. I felt as if someone was choking me and telling me a really sad story at the same time.
But you should see Milo*** in gymnastics class... and you should see Jake*** in ballet and tap and t-ball. It's a trick of the mind to worry about what bad might happen, when there is so much good happening all around. And I think it's a fool's choice to give into worry, when there is so much celebrating to do. These are the heroic lives we lead- planning a little for the worst, but doubting it will ever come and doing so with such loving intention that, that you make your kids feel all the safety the world may or may not offer.
Friday, August 19, 2011
I'm not going to have to join Tumblr now, am I?!?
I don't really know WTF Tumblr is except it is a different platform for posting info...
Sort of like a cross between Blogger and Twitter, but I came across this and it made me cry... I read it several times and several times I just couldn't help but squeeze out a few tears.
Go Ahead, I dare you not to weep a little at the obviousness of these parental instincts and the "Well sure- it is about time" rarity of something written so simply, so honestly...
[CLICK ON ABOVE] to visit the page...
A few additional thoughts...
1) This is what is good about the Internet- there are so many options for creation and beauty. You can't focus on the debauchery without acknowledging the space (enormous space) that exists as it never has before to CREATE...
2) This was this mom's FIRST Tumblr posting. She likely told a few friends and within 2 days 37,500 people had commented on the post (that does not include the heaven-knows-how-many of us read it without comment)
3) This type of "going viral" is sort of appealing to me... it's like a "gold rush" for the "twenty-tens". You never know what shit is going to take off.
Monday, May 09, 2011
UPDATE: Wow... Bill Maher- Truth teller
UPDATE: HBO pulled the video, but has the transcript here.
--------------------
I didn't laugh, so much as cringed- sometimes the truth does hurt.
--------------------
I didn't laugh, so much as cringed- sometimes the truth does hurt.
Monday, March 14, 2011
Beware of the red balloon
I was totally entertained by this, until the end when the implications of it kind of...
totally...
freaked.
me.
out.
Pretty awesome, right?
I couldn't do it, but shouldn't it be harder than that to hack time square?!?
totally...
freaked.
me.
out.
Pretty awesome, right?
I couldn't do it, but shouldn't it be harder than that to hack time square?!?
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Section 3 of DOMA...
There have been some cRaZy ShIt AmAzInG things going on in the world these last few weeks.
I'm watching the news with my mouth half-hanging open these days:
There was a peaceful Egyptian revolution. For realz. Egyptian citizens began protesting and demonstrating on January 25th, and on Feb 11th (2.11.11)President Dictator Hosni Mubarak stepped down ending a nearly 30 year reign.
Feb 23rd, President Barack Obama directed the Department of JUSTICE to stop defending DOMA in court. (HOLY SHIT!) In a letter sent to Speaker Boehner, Attorney General Eric Holder explained that the Obama administration has determined that Section 3 of the law is unconstitutional:
From Wikipedia:
So, like, this worked as a law when where there were no states that had legalized marriage equality. And when there were some "civil unions" out there, it was okay to say you can't call them marriages
basically, under "heightened scrutiny" the government won't defend something with hypothetical arguments that increasing amounts of evidence show to be inaccurate or at least unsubstantiated.
Or as Katy text'd me earlier: "obama just said FU to DOMA (Ain't that some shit?)"
Aint that some shit indeed!
I'm watching the news with my mouth half-hanging open these days:
There was a peaceful Egyptian revolution. For realz. Egyptian citizens began protesting and demonstrating on January 25th, and on Feb 11th (2.11.11)
Feb 23rd, President Barack Obama directed the Department of JUSTICE to stop defending DOMA in court. (HOLY SHIT!) In a letter sent to Speaker Boehner, Attorney General Eric Holder explained that the Obama administration has determined that Section 3 of the law is unconstitutional:
From Wikipedia:
- Section 2. Powers reserved to the states:
No State, territory, or possession of the United States, or Indian tribe, shall be required to give effect to any public act, record, or judicial proceeding of any other State, territory, possession, or tribe respecting a relationship between persons of the same sex that is treated as a marriage under the laws of such other State, territory, possession, or tribe, or a right or claim arising from such relationship.
In determining the meaning of any Act of Congress, or of any ruling, regulation, or interpretation of the various administrative bureaus and agencies of the United States, the word 'marriage' means only a legal union between one man and one woman as husband and wife, and the word 'spouse' refers only to a person of the opposite sex who is a husband or a wife
- Section 3. Definition of 'marriage' and 'spouse':
So, like, this worked as a law when where there were no states that had legalized marriage equality. And when there were some "civil unions" out there, it was okay to say you can't call them marriages
basically, under "heightened scrutiny" the government won't defend something with hypothetical arguments that increasing amounts of evidence show to be inaccurate or at least unsubstantiated.
Or as Katy text'd me earlier: "obama just said FU to DOMA (Ain't that some shit?)"
Aint that some shit indeed!
Saturday, February 05, 2011
Superbowl VW ad - PREVIEW!
My favorite part except for the tension in the tiny hands, is the perfectly-expressioned parents... with less than 10 seconds of air time, they perfectly capture what it feels like to live with a toddler...
I've watched this 1/2 a dozen times all ready!!!
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Updates from the home front...
1) Katy got home yesterday! Hooray!!! We missed her but she had a wonderful weekend with her peeps and I had some nice alone time with he boys... I felt good about the weekend. We ate well, and spent nice time with cousins. I showered ALL THREE mornings, and even got to shave ONE leg in the shower. Katy asked me, "What made you TRY to shave in the shower?!?" I told her I wanted to stay pretty for me and also, I like a challenge...
2) JB saw his first movie at a movie theater Sunday with his TT, Uncle Bill, cousins, and me. We saw "Tangled". I loved it. The girl cousins were literally vibrating in their seats in excitement. JB thought the whole thing was a little tired. He was absolutely ambivalent. When Mac called him on Saturday to invite him for Sunday, he (without really even knowing what it meant to "go to a movie," without asking any clarifying questions, and without a pause or any genuine consideration) replied, "No, thanks." He used a tone reserved for someone who is totally satisfied and who is invited to eat one more piece of chocolate- No thanks, I'm good. After we talked about what going to a movie was all about (including details of the treats involved- popcorn, candy, etc) he agreed to go and I advised him he better check to see if the invitation still stood.
The movie was sweet and entertaining, but as all Disney cartoon features, it was fairly adult themed and angst-y. JB feels a lot of feelings and did not like the darkness or the sadness that he sensed. The character of Rapunzel's "adopted" mother was played by Donna Murphy with lines that adults could laugh at- full of understated narcissism and self-esteem crushing abusiveness toward Rapunzel. JB couldn't name what that was, but he was uncomfortable with the introduction of her as a "mother". There were also tons of chasing and fighting scenes and a great deal of stated and perceived "sadness" related to the "missing princess". None of that was lost on JB. He sat with a consternated, furrowed brow for most of the movie and he asked 1/2 way through, "When is this over?"
I pointed him toward the antics of the hero horse, Maximus, and told him how great I thought the music was and we lasted until the end. But when I said, "We should bring Mama back to see this movie, I think she would like it." He replied, "No thanks" in that same, "I'm good" tone.
3) The town pool collapsed a little over two Saturdays ago. ML and I had just began our "Mommy and me" lessons and he seemed to really enjoy it. (As did I.) There has been a lot of drama about this town pool and constant complaints and outcries from people about the failures on many levels. They tried to make it an Indoor and and Outdoor pool with some kind of bubble/ retractable roof... a good idea in theory!
But, this is what the pool looked like the day of our first lesson (I was so excited that I snapped a picture on my phone):
And this is what it looks like now:
But that doesn't mean we still aren't worried about her health. I for one nearly pee'd my pants when I saw her on the sled... I was on top of the hill and was like, "WHAT?!? WHO PUT GRAM ON A SLED?!?" She came over dressed for it and had every intention of sledding; without any prompting at all, she put herself on that sled! I was absolutely dying for the 20-40 seconds she was sliding down, but when the sled stopped, (and she hadn't slammed her body into the side of the foundation or broken any bones) I was so thrilled and proud!!! She rocks!
5) One of the more glorious aspects of this winter has been the amazing and spacious 2 car garage that came with our house. There is nothing like pulling out into winter weather with a clean car... the awesomeness is dampened a little by the recent breaking of BOTH of our garage door openers... you win some, you lose some I always say. But thanks to facebook, I've got a friend that "knows a guy", so hopefully, we should be able to fix the situation soon!
2) JB saw his first movie at a movie theater Sunday with his TT, Uncle Bill, cousins, and me. We saw "Tangled". I loved it. The girl cousins were literally vibrating in their seats in excitement. JB thought the whole thing was a little tired. He was absolutely ambivalent. When Mac called him on Saturday to invite him for Sunday, he (without really even knowing what it meant to "go to a movie," without asking any clarifying questions, and without a pause or any genuine consideration) replied, "No, thanks." He used a tone reserved for someone who is totally satisfied and who is invited to eat one more piece of chocolate- No thanks, I'm good. After we talked about what going to a movie was all about (including details of the treats involved- popcorn, candy, etc) he agreed to go and I advised him he better check to see if the invitation still stood.
The movie was sweet and entertaining, but as all Disney cartoon features, it was fairly adult themed and angst-y. JB feels a lot of feelings and did not like the darkness or the sadness that he sensed. The character of Rapunzel's "adopted" mother was played by Donna Murphy with lines that adults could laugh at- full of understated narcissism and self-esteem crushing abusiveness toward Rapunzel. JB couldn't name what that was, but he was uncomfortable with the introduction of her as a "mother". There were also tons of chasing and fighting scenes and a great deal of stated and perceived "sadness" related to the "missing princess". None of that was lost on JB. He sat with a consternated, furrowed brow for most of the movie and he asked 1/2 way through, "When is this over?"
I pointed him toward the antics of the hero horse, Maximus, and told him how great I thought the music was and we lasted until the end. But when I said, "We should bring Mama back to see this movie, I think she would like it." He replied, "No thanks" in that same, "I'm good" tone.
3) The town pool collapsed a little over two Saturdays ago. ML and I had just began our "Mommy and me" lessons and he seemed to really enjoy it. (As did I.) There has been a lot of drama about this town pool and constant complaints and outcries from people about the failures on many levels. They tried to make it an Indoor and and Outdoor pool with some kind of bubble/ retractable roof... a good idea in theory!
But, this is what the pool looked like the day of our first lesson (I was so excited that I snapped a picture on my phone):
And this is what it looks like now:
I mean, yeah... thank God no one was in there when it happened, right?!?
There is a lot of outrage in the town about it. I really do feel bad for the planners and decision makers. Obviously there wasn't the support to spend the money that they needed to spend for a durable and effective retractable roof. I guess they should have just built an indoor pool, but someone obviously thought it would be good to have a town pool that people could join in the summer.
We've had a championship level swim team in this town since I was a kid and there still isn't the support of the tax payers to give these kids a pool of their own. They have always been at the Y or at the Academy, or borrowing space at other town's pools. It is just too bad. The word on the street is now they have to heat the pool to some degree for the rest of the winter to keep everything from freezing and getting completely damaged. Crazy.
But that doesn't mean we still aren't worried about her health. I for one nearly pee'd my pants when I saw her on the sled... I was on top of the hill and was like, "WHAT?!? WHO PUT GRAM ON A SLED?!?" She came over dressed for it and had every intention of sledding; without any prompting at all, she put herself on that sled! I was absolutely dying for the 20-40 seconds she was sliding down, but when the sled stopped, (and she hadn't slammed her body into the side of the foundation or broken any bones) I was so thrilled and proud!!! She rocks!
5) One of the more glorious aspects of this winter has been the amazing and spacious 2 car garage that came with our house. There is nothing like pulling out into winter weather with a clean car... the awesomeness is dampened a little by the recent breaking of BOTH of our garage door openers... you win some, you lose some I always say. But thanks to facebook, I've got a friend that "knows a guy", so hopefully, we should be able to fix the situation soon!
Thursday, January 20, 2011
A wacko with a legal gun in Arizona and 31 bullets before he had to pause to reload
I haven't said anything here on the blog yet about the act of domestic terrorism that occurred 2 Saturdays ago in Tuscon, AZ. I am very troubled by it and very angry and have been waiting a little until some of the sharpness of my emotional reaction is filed down a bit by time. In case you are living under a rock and don't know the story, a 22 year old American went to the "Congress in your Corner" event for Gabrielle Giffords in front of a Safeway in Tuscon. With a semi-automatic Glock that had an ammunition clip containing 31 bullets, he shot 19 people, killing 6 including a 30 year old congressional aid, a 63 year old federal judge, and a 9 year old girl who was born on September 11, 2001.
The murderer and would-be assassin shot Congresswoman Giffords in the forehead from 1-3 feet away, and the bullet went straight through the left side of her brain. The motive seems to be paranoia, anti-government sentiment, and mental illness. The conservative-wing of the Republican party seems to have been has been turned upside-down and their righteous indignation has been scattered all over the carpet like a pocketful of coins- due to the ensuing discussion of relevant information that unfolded during the reporting of the story.
This particular area of the country is one of the districts that Sarah Palin marked a with cross-hairs on a map to say that the incumbent congresswomen needed to be "taken out" during the most recent election cycle in November 2010. Several days after the shooting, Palin herself release a video commentary drenched in politics, the first half of which said, (I'm about to paraphrase while using quotes:) "I care a lot about the victims too... God will hopefully help them... but I'm here to talk about me: Healthy critique and criticism in a democracy- like I inspired when I put the up the map with cross-hairs on my website; and promptly took down a few hours after the shooting- is not only good, it is paramount to preserving liberty. This happened only because of an evil man. Anyone who even talks about violent rhetoric as it relates to me or this tragedy is an asshole who hates America!!!" Then in the 2nd half of the video she pretty clearly says, (again, I paraphrase:) "Besides, this guy was a commie, pinko, nut job and if anyone is to blame, it is liberals. They are very evil themselves for attempting to take part in healthy critique and criticism (of me)! That is not what America is about!!! God bless, God, God, Blah, blah, God, God, America..."
I swear this is a fairly accurate recap... you can see the video yourself here if you are into it. (I watched it twice, but I admit that was only because I fell asleep a little the first time.)
Since the day of the shooting- while the congresswomen fights for her life, has endured at least 4 surgeries, and starts to learn how to stand, walk, speak, and understand what a mobile phone is for again- The NRA has gone out straight up with the battle cry of guns don't kill people, deranged people kill people and there should be NO RESTRICTIONS whatsoever on GUNS. The republicans (for the most part, though it seems like Dick Cheney might be a notable exception) have been unwilling even to discuss the re-enactment of a Clinton era bill that outlawed magazine clips that contain more than 10 bullets for semi-automatic weapons.
The story from AZ that day is that the gun man was stopped when he ran out of bullets. When the magazine was empty and he tried to change the ammunition clip, he was overpowered by 2-3 men and a women who were present and are now hailed as heroes. There was also at least one witness present who was armed, but never drew his weapon because as a responsible gun owner he was afraid that he would either have killed the wrong person or be mistaken as a second shooter and be killed himself.
All of Fox news and most of the GOP cried holy hell when the Sheriff in that district stated in the immediate aftermath of the tragedy (and has refused to apologize, recant, or back away from his assertion) that the violent rhetoric that exists in the area is so significant that if it did not contribute to the cause of an incident like this, at a minimum, it made this event something that should not have been a surprise.
I'm compelled to write today, because this clip from the Lawrence O'Donnell show made me just SHUT my mouth. I shut my mouth because finally someone said something so close to what I want to say that, well, there is nothing really more to say... Watch:
Don't... be silly.
The murderer and would-be assassin shot Congresswoman Giffords in the forehead from 1-3 feet away, and the bullet went straight through the left side of her brain. The motive seems to be paranoia, anti-government sentiment, and mental illness. The conservative-wing of the Republican party seems to have been has been turned upside-down and their righteous indignation has been scattered all over the carpet like a pocketful of coins- due to the ensuing discussion of relevant information that unfolded during the reporting of the story.
This particular area of the country is one of the districts that Sarah Palin marked a with cross-hairs on a map to say that the incumbent congresswomen needed to be "taken out" during the most recent election cycle in November 2010. Several days after the shooting, Palin herself release a video commentary drenched in politics, the first half of which said, (I'm about to paraphrase while using quotes:) "I care a lot about the victims too... God will hopefully help them... but I'm here to talk about me: Healthy critique and criticism in a democracy- like I inspired when I put the up the map with cross-hairs on my website; and promptly took down a few hours after the shooting- is not only good, it is paramount to preserving liberty. This happened only because of an evil man. Anyone who even talks about violent rhetoric as it relates to me or this tragedy is an asshole who hates America!!!" Then in the 2nd half of the video she pretty clearly says, (again, I paraphrase:) "Besides, this guy was a commie, pinko, nut job and if anyone is to blame, it is liberals. They are very evil themselves for attempting to take part in healthy critique and criticism (of me)! That is not what America is about!!! God bless, God, God, Blah, blah, God, God, America..."
I swear this is a fairly accurate recap... you can see the video yourself here if you are into it. (I watched it twice, but I admit that was only because I fell asleep a little the first time.)
Since the day of the shooting- while the congresswomen fights for her life, has endured at least 4 surgeries, and starts to learn how to stand, walk, speak, and understand what a mobile phone is for again- The NRA has gone out straight up with the battle cry of guns don't kill people, deranged people kill people and there should be NO RESTRICTIONS whatsoever on GUNS. The republicans (for the most part, though it seems like Dick Cheney might be a notable exception) have been unwilling even to discuss the re-enactment of a Clinton era bill that outlawed magazine clips that contain more than 10 bullets for semi-automatic weapons.
The story from AZ that day is that the gun man was stopped when he ran out of bullets. When the magazine was empty and he tried to change the ammunition clip, he was overpowered by 2-3 men and a women who were present and are now hailed as heroes. There was also at least one witness present who was armed, but never drew his weapon because as a responsible gun owner he was afraid that he would either have killed the wrong person or be mistaken as a second shooter and be killed himself.
All of Fox news and most of the GOP cried holy hell when the Sheriff in that district stated in the immediate aftermath of the tragedy (and has refused to apologize, recant, or back away from his assertion) that the violent rhetoric that exists in the area is so significant that if it did not contribute to the cause of an incident like this, at a minimum, it made this event something that should not have been a surprise.
I'm compelled to write today, because this clip from the Lawrence O'Donnell show made me just SHUT my mouth. I shut my mouth because finally someone said something so close to what I want to say that, well, there is nothing really more to say... Watch:
Don't... be silly.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Your snowblower CAN'T HELP YOU NOW!!!
We have soooooooooo much snow here right now.
The week after Christmas, we got 10-12" of a powdery mix. A snowman was built and several days later, some of the snow melted, the snowman broke into three separate balls, but certainly, we never saw the grass again. Friday the 7th, we got about a foot more. That snow was so fluffy and powdery that you could not even put a snowball together. I tried and tried, but could not make a snowball- SO FLUFFY!!!
(See the snow behind him on the deck?)
(JB is in front and ML is bringing up the rear)
Then last Wednesday, we got another TWENTY inches of the same pure, dry powdery snow. We have been shoveling our asses off, but it has been a pleasure- I mean, you could go through several New England winters and not have a snow anywhere as near as awesome as the last 3 we have gotten in the last 3 weeks. Also, the temp has only been getting up to about 32 during the day, so it is not melting and getting wet and then refreezing. It has been fluffy and puffy and dry, cold snow for about 3 weeks.
Today, we got about 3 inches of snow followed by 6 hours of slushy, frozen rain. This is more like it... This is more like the weather I am used to expecting and enjoying. This is the stuff that really hurts to shovel. This is the stuff that God invented to mock you for running out and impulse-buying that shiny snowblower (we did not do that, btw). This is the stuff that leaves the trees full of sharp ice-bullets and your back yard shiny like a Zamboni'd hockey rink.
For the last 3 weeks, when the snowplow came by to barf up that extra foot of junk onto the edge of my newly dug out driveway, I could barely complain- it was so fluffy... Deep, but still not icy, you know? But tonight, this is the stuff that pulls groins, and spasms lower backs, and leaves grown people weeping icicles. THIS is what I'm talking about, THIS is New England!!!
BUT this ice is on 22-36 inches of snow, SRSLY. So THAT is not normal at all.
The middle of our front yard has over 2 feet of snow on it. The snow banks that line our driveway are at least as high as my waist. Many sections of them are higher than my shoulders. The mailbox is buried. It is insane! Shoveling icy, slushy, sleety snow over your head is a work out. You get dressed in your winter clothes and they get wet from the inside out.
Thing is, it is exhausting. And I'm starting to get all worried about the roof holding up and the gutters not falling down, and the basement not flooding...
Still, I'm enjoying it. It is extreme and fun and awe-inspiring.
And look what it is doing to the boys:
(Young boys, obsessed with plows)
NOTE:
all of this pics are from 1 or 2 storms ago... I did not yet include any pics of today's additionally precipitation. Also, I am going to try and get some footage of downhill sledding up on the blog asap... So adorable!
The week after Christmas, we got 10-12" of a powdery mix. A snowman was built and several days later, some of the snow melted, the snowman broke into three separate balls, but certainly, we never saw the grass again. Friday the 7th, we got about a foot more. That snow was so fluffy and powdery that you could not even put a snowball together. I tried and tried, but could not make a snowball- SO FLUFFY!!!
(See the snow behind him on the deck?)
(JB is in front and ML is bringing up the rear)
Then last Wednesday, we got another TWENTY inches of the same pure, dry powdery snow. We have been shoveling our asses off, but it has been a pleasure- I mean, you could go through several New England winters and not have a snow anywhere as near as awesome as the last 3 we have gotten in the last 3 weeks. Also, the temp has only been getting up to about 32 during the day, so it is not melting and getting wet and then refreezing. It has been fluffy and puffy and dry, cold snow for about 3 weeks.
Today, we got about 3 inches of snow followed by 6 hours of slushy, frozen rain. This is more like it... This is more like the weather I am used to expecting and enjoying. This is the stuff that really hurts to shovel. This is the stuff that God invented to mock you for running out and impulse-buying that shiny snowblower (we did not do that, btw). This is the stuff that leaves the trees full of sharp ice-bullets and your back yard shiny like a Zamboni'd hockey rink.
For the last 3 weeks, when the snowplow came by to barf up that extra foot of junk onto the edge of my newly dug out driveway, I could barely complain- it was so fluffy... Deep, but still not icy, you know? But tonight, this is the stuff that pulls groins, and spasms lower backs, and leaves grown people weeping icicles. THIS is what I'm talking about, THIS is New England!!!
BUT this ice is on 22-36 inches of snow, SRSLY. So THAT is not normal at all.
The middle of our front yard has over 2 feet of snow on it. The snow banks that line our driveway are at least as high as my waist. Many sections of them are higher than my shoulders. The mailbox is buried. It is insane! Shoveling icy, slushy, sleety snow over your head is a work out. You get dressed in your winter clothes and they get wet from the inside out.
Thing is, it is exhausting. And I'm starting to get all worried about the roof holding up and the gutters not falling down, and the basement not flooding...
Still, I'm enjoying it. It is extreme and fun and awe-inspiring.
And look what it is doing to the boys:
(Young boys, obsessed with plows)
NOTE:
all of this pics are from 1 or 2 storms ago... I did not yet include any pics of today's additionally precipitation. Also, I am going to try and get some footage of downhill sledding up on the blog asap... So adorable!
Wednesday, January 05, 2011
Today begins the reign of the 112th congress of the USA
And here are some other highlights.
It's taken me three full days to believe that I'm back at work after the wonderful couple of weeks we've had:
1. Week before Christmas = STAYcation. Katy and I were off from work together without traveling anywhere for the first time in at least 5 years. During that time, JB got his third set of ear tubes surgically implanted (3rd in 3 years). He did great. We were home by 10 AM. He watched more TV that day than any other day of his life and quite possibly more TV than any other WEEK in his life.
2. Christmas at TT's and Bill's house. We spent the better part of 14 hours there, eating, playing, opening gifts, and eating. Did I say that twice? I meant to...
3. The grannies came for a visit. They were able to avoid wintery weather during the long commute to and from Ohio, but got to enjoy a good ol'fashioned CT blizzard while they were here. JB and ML got to build their first huge snowman and go sledding around the yard with them. (JB's had a few winters, but none where he ever wanted to TOUCH the snow before.)
4. New years weekend was relatively quiet and Katy and I enjoyed some special times alone with our boys.
Today, Katy and I went to our first wake of the year.
Tomorrow, a funeral. Not someone we know, but the dad of someone we love.
-------------
Looking back, as I said above, we had some wonderful times over the holidays.
I feel so lucky and blessed, but I have to say, the holidays beat the shit out of me this year.
I spend a lot of time worrying. Anxiety-ridden might be a more honest analysis of the scene.
It was the first Christmas that "Santa" mattered to JB and the number of times I forgot that I didn't get something at "toys r'us" but "Santa brought it" was too many to count. He's easy to fool right now, but I've gotta get into this game, or the jig will be up by the time ML is 3...
So, I was worried about not being a good enough Santa.
I was worried about not being a good enough wife.
I was worried about money and time and family- not living up to the expectations of everyone. Or rather, not living up to my own expectations and not feeling like everyone judges me as harshly as I judge myself. I was worried about JB's impending surgery on the 21st of December. I was worried about getting the "right" gifts and not just getting gifts for the sake of getting gifts. I was worried about not being able to get done the "special gifts" like photo calendars and cookies that we planned to get done. I was worried about Katy and I not agreeing on all of these things related to gifts and how to celebrate the holidays (after all these years together, it is only now that that are kids are starting to understand a world that does not end at the tips of their fingers that Katy and I have to really start communicating about what we want the holidays to be for us and our boys). I was worried that the ways that Katy and I try to answer these questions and compromise for each other will not make sense to all of our parents - who we desperately want to be with and be respectful of but who we don't always agree with. I was worried about how I can possibly instill a sense of peace and joy and zen about Christmas (and life in general) into my children, if I am on the verge of panic all the time at this time of the year.
I was worried about work and projects that were very time sensitive and I had set a high expectation of success that would be a direct reflection of my work and require me to call in a lot of personal favors. I was worried about the weather and the house in the winter and getting the cars in the garage, and decorating, and keeping the house neat and clean, and warm! And spending enough time with the kids and trying to balance these two desires to 1) expose our kids to a lot of wonderful of people and things, get them out into the world to see lights and celebrations, and have them know family and friends that are family and 2) have quiet times alone at home with them, keep them grounded in a safe and reasonable schedule, and not drag them all over creation for things that they do not really need or understand right now.
It was a lot. And it started for me at the beginning of November. And I tried with some success to stay in the moment and did have some beautiful moments, and did (I think) manage to take care of my wife who was experiencing similar things herself... I think we did a good job with it all, but I feel like some of the (mostly self-imposed) pressure is off now. To be honest this week, I let out a big sigh of relief.
I'm going to work on this. I don't want every year to feel oxygen flushing back into my lungs with the prospect of the holidays ending. Yet, feeling a rush of Oxygen in your lungs is a good feeling, no matter how one comes by it.
So now back to the business of governing the nation...
It's taken me three full days to believe that I'm back at work after the wonderful couple of weeks we've had:
1. Week before Christmas = STAYcation. Katy and I were off from work together without traveling anywhere for the first time in at least 5 years. During that time, JB got his third set of ear tubes surgically implanted (3rd in 3 years). He did great. We were home by 10 AM. He watched more TV that day than any other day of his life and quite possibly more TV than any other WEEK in his life.
2. Christmas at TT's and Bill's house. We spent the better part of 14 hours there, eating, playing, opening gifts, and eating. Did I say that twice? I meant to...
3. The grannies came for a visit. They were able to avoid wintery weather during the long commute to and from Ohio, but got to enjoy a good ol'fashioned CT blizzard while they were here. JB and ML got to build their first huge snowman and go sledding around the yard with them. (JB's had a few winters, but none where he ever wanted to TOUCH the snow before.)
4. New years weekend was relatively quiet and Katy and I enjoyed some special times alone with our boys.
Today, Katy and I went to our first wake of the year.
Tomorrow, a funeral. Not someone we know, but the dad of someone we love.
-------------
Looking back, as I said above, we had some wonderful times over the holidays.
I feel so lucky and blessed, but I have to say, the holidays beat the shit out of me this year.
I spend a lot of time worrying. Anxiety-ridden might be a more honest analysis of the scene.
It was the first Christmas that "Santa" mattered to JB and the number of times I forgot that I didn't get something at "toys r'us" but "Santa brought it" was too many to count. He's easy to fool right now, but I've gotta get into this game, or the jig will be up by the time ML is 3...
So, I was worried about not being a good enough Santa.
I was worried about not being a good enough wife.
I was worried about money and time and family- not living up to the expectations of everyone. Or rather, not living up to my own expectations and not feeling like everyone judges me as harshly as I judge myself. I was worried about JB's impending surgery on the 21st of December. I was worried about getting the "right" gifts and not just getting gifts for the sake of getting gifts. I was worried about not being able to get done the "special gifts" like photo calendars and cookies that we planned to get done. I was worried about Katy and I not agreeing on all of these things related to gifts and how to celebrate the holidays (after all these years together, it is only now that that are kids are starting to understand a world that does not end at the tips of their fingers that Katy and I have to really start communicating about what we want the holidays to be for us and our boys). I was worried that the ways that Katy and I try to answer these questions and compromise for each other will not make sense to all of our parents - who we desperately want to be with and be respectful of but who we don't always agree with. I was worried about how I can possibly instill a sense of peace and joy and zen about Christmas (and life in general) into my children, if I am on the verge of panic all the time at this time of the year.
I was worried about work and projects that were very time sensitive and I had set a high expectation of success that would be a direct reflection of my work and require me to call in a lot of personal favors. I was worried about the weather and the house in the winter and getting the cars in the garage, and decorating, and keeping the house neat and clean, and warm! And spending enough time with the kids and trying to balance these two desires to 1) expose our kids to a lot of wonderful of people and things, get them out into the world to see lights and celebrations, and have them know family and friends that are family and 2) have quiet times alone at home with them, keep them grounded in a safe and reasonable schedule, and not drag them all over creation for things that they do not really need or understand right now.
It was a lot. And it started for me at the beginning of November. And I tried with some success to stay in the moment and did have some beautiful moments, and did (I think) manage to take care of my wife who was experiencing similar things herself... I think we did a good job with it all, but I feel like some of the (mostly self-imposed) pressure is off now. To be honest this week, I let out a big sigh of relief.
I'm going to work on this. I don't want every year to feel oxygen flushing back into my lungs with the prospect of the holidays ending. Yet, feeling a rush of Oxygen in your lungs is a good feeling, no matter how one comes by it.
So now back to the business of governing the nation...
Tuesday, December 07, 2010
Elizabeth Edwards (July 3, 1949 – December 7, 2010)
The United States of America and the world (to say nothing of progressives and the GLBT community) lost a true hero today.
It almost makes her husband not seem likes such a schmuck- that this woman chose him and loved him.
Respect, Mrs. Edwards.
R.I.P.
-------
btw, my mom told me and I balked that it could not possibly be true (until she was proven correct by the almighty internet) that Elizabeth Edwards had a baby when she was 48 and another one when she was 50 years old... Maybe not "hero" so much as "superhero".
It almost makes her husband not seem likes such a schmuck- that this woman chose him and loved him.
Respect, Mrs. Edwards.
R.I.P.
-------
btw, my mom told me and I balked that it could not possibly be true (until she was proven correct by the almighty internet) that Elizabeth Edwards had a baby when she was 48 and another one when she was 50 years old... Maybe not "hero" so much as "superhero".
Wednesday, October 06, 2010
The first Trial
The verdict is in- 16 guilty counts and 1 not guilty (on the charge of 1st degree arson).
I'm glad for these results... but still heart sick.
Now the jury must decide the sentence.
I'm glad for these results... but still heart sick.
Now the jury must decide the sentence.
Tuesday, October 05, 2010
When religious conservatives preach that to be gay is to be disordered and not in the image of God...
At least 5 times in the last 2 months, there have been national stories of teenagers committing suicide. They have become national stories because the kids were bullied, targeted, and harassed because they were gay or perceived as gay, and because for the most part, the parents, friends and communities of those children have spoken out after their deaths to say, "We complained about the bullying but no one did anything to stop it."
Not that one should be picked out as worse than the others, but the most recent was a Freshman at Rutgers University who was secretly recorded by his roommate and another classmate having an intimate encounter with anotherman boy. Tyler Clementi was 18 years old when he changed his status on Facebook to read: "Jumping off the George Washington Bridge. Sorry." His body was fished out of the water a few days later.
Justin Aaberg, 15, of Anoka,
Minnasota, hung himself July 9th
Billy Lucas, 15, of Greensburg,
Indiana hung himself in his parents' barn on Sept 9th.
Seth Walsh, 13, from Tehachapi, California, hanged himself from a tree on September 19th and died 8 days later.
Asher Brown, 13, of Cypress, Texas, shot himself in the head on September 23.
It is hard to look at these faces and hear these stories and not get sick with regret and dark with rage that we live in a society that tells (especially boy) gay kids that they are not worthy of love and life. In fact, the message in a lot of anti-gay rhetoric is "you don't exist... God did not create you, you are deciding to be immoral- you can be fixed".
To tell someone they can be fixed is to tell them they are broken.
Ask nearly any adult gay man (many to most of the women too) and they will tell you the harassment they faced, the physical danger they were in growing up in school systems across this country was almost too much to manage. Now even though there is more support for gay equality and more awareness and "tolerance" there is this overt backlash and religious movement to proclaim that civil rights for gay citizens are somehow in opposition to the religious rights of zealots. That gay civil rights somehow means the end of religious freedom.
While the LDS and the RCC are pouring millions of dollars into trying to prevent civil marriage in the US and around the world, they are not only perpetuating thebullshit very-fucking-scientifically-negated notion that being gay is a choice, they are seriously over-reaching by extrapolating out that this (determined by conservative clergy, who very often are closeted and sexually repressed) "lifestyle choice" should not get legal "validation" or protection...
'Cause like, yeah... if I choose to eat shellfish, or get a divorce, or not marry the brother of my dead husband, or eat meat on fridays, or have sex during my period (all lifestyle choices that are frowned on by g-o-d in the bible) then I should expect it's okay for my neighbors to beat me to death when they get too upset about my immorality. Oh, and I should expect there to be a referendum on election day where everyone gets to vote on whether or not I am immoral and have a right to exist in my actual form.
Here is how "religious" people are getting led down a dark ally by their leaders that will some day be appropriately equated with the cross-burnings and terrorist activities of the KKK: A cycle of proselytizing against gay identity requires suicide of gay individuals to 1) continue to demonstrate (in the face of practically eroded evidence) that to be gay means to be mentally and spiritually unstable; and 2) since most religions see suicide as the final sin- there is no way a person that killed her/his self could have been spiritually worthy...
See how that works? Chicken, egg, chicken, egg... got it?
Let me try one more time:
So HERE's the letter that I'm writing to my kids, and the advice that I'm giving to all parents within my reach...
If you enjoyed this rant, you might also enjoy something similar from Dan Savage. If you have never heard of Dan Savage, he is a potty-mouthed gay, sex advice columnist that came up with the greatest idea I have heard in a long time. A YouTube channel called: IT GETS BETTER. This is a way to try to stop kids from killing themselves... a way that any kid with the internet has access to a bunch of videos from LGBTQ adults that can tell them from experience that the best years of your life happen after high school.
The videos are amazing. Here is the video that Dan and his husband started it all with (it is worth 8 minutes of your life- pass it on):
Not that one should be picked out as worse than the others, but the most recent was a Freshman at Rutgers University who was secretly recorded by his roommate and another classmate having an intimate encounter with another
Justin Aaberg, 15, of Anoka,
Minnasota, hung himself July 9thBilly Lucas, 15, of Greensburg,
Indiana hung himself in his parents' barn on Sept 9th.Seth Walsh, 13, from Tehachapi, California, hanged himself from a tree on September 19th and died 8 days later.
Asher Brown, 13, of Cypress, Texas, shot himself in the head on September 23.
It is hard to look at these faces and hear these stories and not get sick with regret and dark with rage that we live in a society that tells (especially boy) gay kids that they are not worthy of love and life. In fact, the message in a lot of anti-gay rhetoric is "you don't exist... God did not create you, you are deciding to be immoral- you can be fixed".To tell someone they can be fixed is to tell them they are broken.
Ask nearly any adult gay man (many to most of the women too) and they will tell you the harassment they faced, the physical danger they were in growing up in school systems across this country was almost too much to manage. Now even though there is more support for gay equality and more awareness and "tolerance" there is this overt backlash and religious movement to proclaim that civil rights for gay citizens are somehow in opposition to the religious rights of zealots. That gay civil rights somehow means the end of religious freedom.
While the LDS and the RCC are pouring millions of dollars into trying to prevent civil marriage in the US and around the world, they are not only perpetuating the
'Cause like, yeah... if I choose to eat shellfish, or get a divorce, or not marry the brother of my dead husband, or eat meat on fridays, or have sex during my period (all lifestyle choices that are frowned on by g-o-d in the bible) then I should expect it's okay for my neighbors to beat me to death when they get too upset about my immorality. Oh, and I should expect there to be a referendum on election day where everyone gets to vote on whether or not I am immoral and have a right to exist in my actual form.
Here is how "religious" people are getting led down a dark ally by their leaders that will some day be appropriately equated with the cross-burnings and terrorist activities of the KKK: A cycle of proselytizing against gay identity requires suicide of gay individuals to 1) continue to demonstrate (in the face of practically eroded evidence) that to be gay means to be mentally and spiritually unstable; and 2) since most religions see suicide as the final sin- there is no way a person that killed her/his self could have been spiritually worthy...
See how that works? Chicken, egg, chicken, egg... got it?
Let me try one more time:
- God hates it/you (as determined by me)
- If God hates it/you, we can't exactly expect others to be okay with it/you
- If those others beat you up or harass you... well, see what I mean about you/it being messed up? millions of God-loving people can't be wrong...
- What you think you are can't be real because God is not okay with you/it
- If you kill yourself, you must have somehow known this to be true
- oh, and also- those people telling you that it's okay to be gay are confusing you and they are also part of the thing God hates and most of the reason you probably killed yourself is because they confused you...
- No one who thinks that "being gay is okay" should teach you, or talk to you, or be alone with you, or be in a position to influence you because 1) God would not want that, 2) Those people are immoral, unstable, and dangerous 3) They are out to recruit you (since you were NOT created gay, the only way into "gay" is through RECRUITMENT!)
- PS- I'm not intolerant, God is...
So HERE's the letter that I'm writing to my kids, and the advice that I'm giving to all parents within my reach...
If you enjoyed this rant, you might also enjoy something similar from Dan Savage. If you have never heard of Dan Savage, he is a potty-mouthed gay, sex advice columnist that came up with the greatest idea I have heard in a long time. A YouTube channel called: IT GETS BETTER. This is a way to try to stop kids from killing themselves... a way that any kid with the internet has access to a bunch of videos from LGBTQ adults that can tell them from experience that the best years of your life happen after high school.
The videos are amazing. Here is the video that Dan and his husband started it all with (it is worth 8 minutes of your life- pass it on):
Sunday, September 12, 2010
1148 days
3 years and 2 months...
In our lives, since that day:
- one house sold
- one house purchased
- 3 anniversaries
- two children born
- three family surgeries- 1 c-section, 1 tonsillectomy, 2 sets of ear tubes
- Stitches put in all of us except the little one who needed a head CT, MRI, several lumbar punctures, and a whole bunch of other nonsense.
1148 days and nights of life and love and laughter, stress and grief, hunger and fullness, exhaustion and rest...
Countless conversations...
Weddings and vacations...
Drinking and dancing...
Playing, tickling, swimming, and nights at the pool...
Breast feeding, potty training, falling down and getting back up...
Tears of sadness and of happiness...
Many injuries have healed and scars formed,
but still, there is one big, unresolved, sucking wound...
We try to stay back from this. We try to have faith, have hope, and not get caught up in the fear and sadness that a tragedy like this leaves behind. We pray- for peace, for justice, for the man that survives- the man that exists but does not really exist, since that day...
There are things that can never be explained, repaired, or forgiven...
We are not vengeful people, but there are things for which vengeance was invented...
Senseless things for which there is no satisfactory atonement, nor any appropriate emotional response...
The next few weeks should be filled with joy: There are many things to celebrate in September. But our emotions will be layered, textured, and likely raw in the coming month...
The first trial is scheduled to start tomorrow.
In our lives, since that day:
- one house sold
- one house purchased
- 3 anniversaries
- two children born
- three family surgeries- 1 c-section, 1 tonsillectomy, 2 sets of ear tubes
- Stitches put in all of us except the little one who needed a head CT, MRI, several lumbar punctures, and a whole bunch of other nonsense.
1148 days and nights of life and love and laughter, stress and grief, hunger and fullness, exhaustion and rest...
Countless conversations...
Weddings and vacations...
Drinking and dancing...
Playing, tickling, swimming, and nights at the pool...
Breast feeding, potty training, falling down and getting back up...
Tears of sadness and of happiness...
Many injuries have healed and scars formed,
but still, there is one big, unresolved, sucking wound...
We try to stay back from this. We try to have faith, have hope, and not get caught up in the fear and sadness that a tragedy like this leaves behind. We pray- for peace, for justice, for the man that survives- the man that exists but does not really exist, since that day...
There are things that can never be explained, repaired, or forgiven...
We are not vengeful people, but there are things for which vengeance was invented...
Senseless things for which there is no satisfactory atonement, nor any appropriate emotional response...
The next few weeks should be filled with joy: There are many things to celebrate in September. But our emotions will be layered, textured, and likely raw in the coming month...
The first trial is scheduled to start tomorrow.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Sign of the Times: Current Events
There has been some crazy shit going on in the world in these last 2 weeks...
The news cycles are just jam-packed full.
What's going on in Britain?!?
The Prime Minister of Britain, Gordon Brown, resigned today. I can't figure out why. His party has lost a lot of seats in the Parliament, and he announced plans to step down, but then literally the next day, he stepped down
SCOTUS Nomineee
Over the weekend
, President Obama named Elena Kegan as his 2nd supreme court nominee...
Is she gay or not? It seems like "people in the know" know that she is. Now her "Friends" have come out to say, "She isn't"... I don't know if that's true or not, but a closeted lesbian scares me a little politically. The people that hate me and my people don't want her on the bench b/c they think if she's (secretly) gay, then she will rule for her own rights should a case come up. But I think if she is secretly gay, there's a bigger chance she will rule against "her" own rights (Which of course are also MY rights.)
Oil Spill
Last week, a big oil rig in the Gulf of Mexico caught fire and sank, leaving 3 holes in the pipe that is broken but still connected to the oil well.
This is underwater video of oil pouring out of the biggest of the 3 leaks:
Something like 500,000 barrels of oil a day are leaking out into the Gulf of Mexico.
Let that sink in for a moment. When this first happened (April 20th) I was like, "O.M.G, how awful!" But now I'm a little more like
o.
m.
g...
I mean this is really, really tragic. This will have effects on the environment and the world for generations. The oil has reached the Gulf coast (bu-bye yummy shrimp) and is likely to head up the Atlantic coast too (goodbye crabs and fish and lobsters), not to mention the bird and the people... It is just incomprehensible.
Drill, Baby, Drill...
indeed.
Immigration Racism
Also on the WTF end of the spectrum, Last week, the state of Arizona passed the anti-immigration "Papers, please" law. I haven't read the law, but I understand it requires law enforcement officials to stop anyone that looks as if they could maybe be an illegal immigrant... And the law requires anyone that might possibly look like they might not be white to have to carry around proof of citizenship...
Don't leave home without your papers, please...
Asshats.
The news cycles are just jam-packed full.
What's going on in Britain?!?
The Prime Minister of Britain, Gordon Brown, resigned today. I can't figure out why. His party has lost a lot of seats in the Parliament, and he announced plans to step down, but then literally the next day, he stepped down
SCOTUS Nomineee
Over the weekend
, President Obama named Elena Kegan as his 2nd supreme court nominee...Is she gay or not? It seems like "people in the know" know that she is. Now her "Friends" have come out to say, "She isn't"... I don't know if that's true or not, but a closeted lesbian scares me a little politically. The people that hate me and my people don't want her on the bench b/c they think if she's (secretly) gay, then she will rule for her own rights should a case come up. But I think if she is secretly gay, there's a bigger chance she will rule against "her" own rights (Which of course are also MY rights.)
Oil Spill
Last week, a big oil rig in the Gulf of Mexico caught fire and sank, leaving 3 holes in the pipe that is broken but still connected to the oil well.
This is underwater video of oil pouring out of the biggest of the 3 leaks:
Something like 500,000 barrels of oil a day are leaking out into the Gulf of Mexico.
Let that sink in for a moment. When this first happened (April 20th) I was like, "O.M.G, how awful!" But now I'm a little more like
o.
m.
g...
I mean this is really, really tragic. This will have effects on the environment and the world for generations. The oil has reached the Gulf coast (bu-bye yummy shrimp) and is likely to head up the Atlantic coast too (goodbye crabs and fish and lobsters), not to mention the bird and the people... It is just incomprehensible.
Drill, Baby, Drill...
indeed.
Also on the WTF end of the spectrum, Last week, the state of Arizona passed the anti-immigration "Papers, please" law. I haven't read the law, but I understand it requires law enforcement officials to stop anyone that looks as if they could maybe be an illegal immigrant... And the law requires anyone that might possibly look like they might not be white to have to carry around proof of citizenship...
Don't leave home without your papers, please...
Asshats.
Tuesday, April 06, 2010
We interrupt this blissful life...
To report the most annoying, rhythmic chirping coming from the swampy woods behind our house. I don't know what creature is creating this noise, but it has been going on for 2 days now. Katy thinks it is a bird. But I've never heard of birds up all night, sounding a piercing, chirping alarm.
I've heard crickets and frogs and locusts and this sound is nothing like those. Imagine your smoke detector battery is dying and the thing starts to chirp in warning. But LOUDER... You are NOT IMAGINING IT LOUD ENOUGH! And you are imagining the noise IN your house, but you should be imagining it THROUGH the WINDOWS... somewhere out in the woods.
Also, it goes on and on and there is no option to get up and just change the EFFING battery!
Does anyone know what this is?!?
I need to identify it so that my fantasies of killing it can be more realistic and detailed.
To get away from the noise, I've joined my lovely wife on the couch in front of the woman's NCAA National Basketball championship game. If you know me, you understand this is a measure of last resort. Generally (excepting baseball, golf, and major playoff games) televised sports make me irritable, this is Katy's department. Since my Alma Mater is on the court, and since it actually is a championship game (which qualifies as a "major playoff game") I'm happy to be involved in the spectator-ship. Amazingly, it is a close game- Uconn is undefeated this season and no final score was within double digits.
Katy (and I) like a close game... but she is NOT happy that the scores are so low: with 11:24 left to play, Stanford 25 Uconn 29. They are missing a lot of shots and while there is a case to be made that a low-scoring game means excellent defense; the broadcast seems to be revealing a poor shooting percentage.
I'm gonna go Google "Chirping bird noises at night" now...
UPDATE: 10:30pm:
Still no word on the "bird"
And Uconn won the game 53 to 47
With two consecutive perfect seasons, it is easy to become cynical and say "they have it easy... someone should be able to take them out/down". I'm not accustomed to routing for the top dog- I'm an underdog kind of girl... But these are young women 17-22 years old, and they work their asses off year round. They have sought and worked hard for this perfection... as easy as they made it look, it wasn't handed to them. So good for you BIG BLUE.
Here's a toast to the University of Connecticut, where men are men and women are champions.
I've heard crickets and frogs and locusts and this sound is nothing like those. Imagine your smoke detector battery is dying and the thing starts to chirp in warning. But LOUDER... You are NOT IMAGINING IT LOUD ENOUGH! And you are imagining the noise IN your house, but you should be imagining it THROUGH the WINDOWS... somewhere out in the woods.
Also, it goes on and on and there is no option to get up and just change the EFFING battery!
Does anyone know what this is?!?
I need to identify it so that my fantasies of killing it can be more realistic and detailed.
To get away from the noise, I've joined my lovely wife on the couch in front of the woman's NCAA National Basketball championship game. If you know me, you understand this is a measure of last resort. Generally (excepting baseball, golf, and major playoff games) televised sports make me irritable, this is Katy's department. Since my Alma Mater is on the court, and since it actually is a championship game (which qualifies as a "major playoff game") I'm happy to be involved in the spectator-ship. Amazingly, it is a close game- Uconn is undefeated this season and no final score was within double digits.
Katy (and I) like a close game... but she is NOT happy that the scores are so low: with 11:24 left to play, Stanford 25 Uconn 29. They are missing a lot of shots and while there is a case to be made that a low-scoring game means excellent defense; the broadcast seems to be revealing a poor shooting percentage.
I'm gonna go Google "Chirping bird noises at night" now...
UPDATE: 10:30pm:
Still no word on the "bird"
And Uconn won the game 53 to 47
With two consecutive perfect seasons, it is easy to become cynical and say "they have it easy... someone should be able to take them out/down". I'm not accustomed to routing for the top dog- I'm an underdog kind of girl... But these are young women 17-22 years old, and they work their asses off year round. They have sought and worked hard for this perfection... as easy as they made it look, it wasn't handed to them. So good for you BIG BLUE.
Here's a toast to the University of Connecticut, where men are men and women are champions.
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