Conversations with Kids

JB: (Watching a you tube video of the 747 that has a space shuttle strapped to it's back) Mommy, are the wheels down for landing?
Me: yes... see? (I point to the wheels)
JB: Mommy, do you know why helicopters don't need run ways or landing strips?
Me: why?
JB: Because the blades on the helicopter lift them straight up and down, they don't need runways.

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[After several more exchanges like the one above]
Me: you are very smart. Who teaches you all these smart things?
JB: Mama.
Me: Just Mama? Anyone else?
JB: um... Grandpa, and Mama... and Nana. That's the only people that I can think of that teaches me things.
Me: oh...
(lol)

---------------

JB: (Acting like a radio personality with a pair of "sony walkman style" headphones on. He has tied the plug end to the refigerator so that he is "plugged in".) Who can tell me what it is when an animal sleeps in the winter time- all through the winter???

[Katy and I put our hands in the air like competing teacher's pets]

JB: Mommy, you say it... Your turn- you say what it is to sleep in the wintertime?

Me: Hibernation. When an animal sleeps during the winter, that is called hibernation. (JB nods, encouragingly) Yes... now mama's turn: (He puts his hand up at me to be sure I understand this question is off limits to me) What is it if an animal is awake in the nighttime and sleeps at the daytime??? Mama? Do you know?

Katy: NOCTURNAL! (JB nodding excitedly) When an animal sleeps during the day and is up at night s/he is nocturnal!

JB: Good job, mommy and mama!!!

(go to commercial, Ryan Seacrest)

Section 3 of DOMA...

There have been some cRaZy ShIt AmAzInG things going on in the world these last few weeks.
I'm watching the news with my mouth half-hanging open these days:

There was a peaceful Egyptian revolution. For realz. Egyptian citizens began protesting and demonstrating on January 25th, and on Feb 11th (2.11.11) President Dictator Hosni Mubarak stepped down ending a nearly 30 year reign.

Feb 23rd, President Barack Obama directed the Department of JUSTICE to stop defending DOMA in court. (HOLY SHIT!) In a letter sent to Speaker Boehner, Attorney General Eric Holder explained that the Obama administration has determined that Section 3 of the law is unconstitutional:

From Wikipedia:

Section 2. Powers reserved to the states:

No State, territory, or possession of the United States, or Indian tribe, shall be required to give effect to any public act, record, or judicial proceeding of any other State, territory, possession, or tribe respecting a relationship between persons of the same sex that is treated as a marriage under the laws of such other State, territory, possession, or tribe, or a right or claim arising from such relationship.

Section 3. Definition of 'marriage' and 'spouse':

In determining the meaning of any Act of Congress, or of any ruling, regulation, or interpretation of the various administrative bureaus and agencies of the United States, the word 'marriage' means only a legal union between one man and one woman as husband and wife, and the word 'spouse' refers only to a person of the opposite sex who is a husband or a wife

So, like, this worked as a law when where there were no states that had legalized marriage equality. And when there were some "civil unions" out there, it was okay to say you can't call them marriages
basically, under "heightened scrutiny" the government won't defend something with hypothetical arguments that increasing amounts of evidence show to be inaccurate or at least unsubstantiated.

Or as Katy text'd me earlier: "obama just said FU to DOMA (Ain't that some shit?)"
Aint that some shit indeed!

The Tensile Strength of Cheerios

I tried to write this blog post 2 years ago, but couldn't come up with much more than the name.

Two years ago, I first noticed how the floors of the house were littered with a minefield of Cheerios. JB got those things everywhere. And the ones he wasn't tossing, dropping, and sprinkling about, Katy and I were spilling ourselves. No brooms were active enough to sweep the "danger" clear.

After they achieve a functional pincer grasp and their diets advance beyond mush and slush; after they demonstrate successful mastication of the beloved crunchy oat wheel, then you have to spend a few weeks worrying that they will get distracted while chewing and somehow wedge a cheerio into some narrow portion of their trachea...

THEN, when you are convinced they could chew and swallow a Cheerio in their sleep, you start to use those things for everything: snacks, teethers, passifiers, counting exercises, lessons in sharing, a form of distraction, reward for good behavior... They are like baby dog-biscuits!

Thing is...unless you have live-in help (or are the kind of parent that can't sleep if one item is out of place, or unless your living situation requires ruthless attention to packaging up food lest you attract varmint of all kinds) evidence of the parental overuse of Cheerios invariably shows up all over the floors of your house. I could have predicted all of this, but what caught me by surprise two years ago, and what still amuses me now, is the emergence of this superhuman power I possess: Whether bare-foot or wearing shoes, I have highly sensitive, perceptive abilities in my feet. If I skip, walk, hop, or otherwise landed on a single Cheerio, I can instantaneously reverse course. I will hop up off that thing without even causing damage. Maybe I might crack the "O" into 2 or 3 pieces, but I have learned to instinctively spring-load off those things before crushing them into impossible-to-clean-up piles of oat dust.

At first it was like every WW2 movie you've seen with the soldier's foot on the trip wire and the calculated, slow-motion determining how to back up off of that thing without making a big mess. But then it became smooth and seamless like a 007 dancer.
MUST.
NOT.
CRUSH.
CHEERIOS...
KITCHEN.
FILTHY.
ENOUGH!!!

At some point, we all got better about not leaving Cheerios laying around, and many months could go by without one Cheerio narrowly escaping pulverization. BUT...

Now we are back to Cheerio mayhem again; and my toes and soles and ankles are back at it- bouncing off the cereal scattered around the floors of our house. It's a 1 1/2 year old thing. ML has mad self-feeding skilz, but a pile of Cheerios will not stay above ground when he is their commander.

So this is the part of motherhood is tricky.

You've got to stay on your toes... And you've got to be okay with some dust under your feet.

Bedtime giggler

Valentine's Day pics

We bought our boys love-themed t-shirts for V-Day.
I barely remembered to take photos this AM, but it caused more chaos than one would think:


ML- 17 months old TODAY.
He is modeling his "All you need is love" T-shirt.
He's got his morning face on, hair is high, and he doesn't like it one bit that I am holding an iphone and he is not.



JB- spelling out his "M-O-M" shirt for the camera...

Last week when he was wearing it, he told me,
"That says 'Mom'. It's not for you, it's for Mama."
"Thanks for the clarification," I replied dryly. And then, "You know, you don't have to pick. The 'Mom' on your shirt could stand for both of us... for Mama AND for Mommy."
(pause)
Allowing this concession: "Okay, it can be for both of you."
"Thanks." (eye roll)


JB, putting his arms out as his little brother runs to him.


Heart-bendingly adorable display of brotherly love.


ML (backed up by JB) allowing a pic to be taken because he can see himself in the frame. Note the upper lip wound he sustained in the driveway last week.



It seems like he's smiling here, but he's in the middle of a fit related to me holding an electronic device.


And this is how every photo session ends these days, with one or both of them screaming and crying because they want to control the camera!

But can you believe how big they are getting? And they are so (mostly) sweet, that I have to work every day not to EAT them up!!!

Superbowl VW ad - PREVIEW!

My favorite part except for the tension in the tiny hands, is the perfectly-expressioned parents... with less than 10 seconds of air time, they perfectly capture what it feels like to live with a toddler...

I've watched this 1/2 a dozen times all ready!!!

Conversations with kids

JB (looking through a see-and-learn book): That's a submarine...
Me: What is a submarine?
JB: A submarine is a thing that goes under water.
Me: What kind of thing?
JB: A boat. A boat that people live on that goes under water... (turns page and points) That's a fire station.
Me: What happens at a fire station?
JB: A fire station is where the firemen are and where the trucks are waiting for an emergency. (Turns page.) That's a space shuttle...
Me: What's a space shuttle do?
JB: That's a rocketship... Like an airplane that goes into space and stuff.
Me: (nodding, totally impressed with this display, but trying to keep my cool)
JB: (turns page and points for me) That's a movie set...
Me: What's a movie set? (I'm truly curious how he's going to explain this one...)
JB: That's where they fire up movies...

I lose it!
Hilarious!

Our BABY turns 5 years old!

Today is the 5th (FIFTH) year since our first blog post!!!
We'd like to celebrate!!!

So here's my proposal...

For everyone that comments here today on why they read the blog, Katy and I will randomly select 5 (FIVE)comments and make a $20 donation in your name (or not if you prefer) to the non-profit organization of your choice..

You have until MIDNIGHT PST (that's 3 AM EST) to comment...
Say anything you want in the form of a comment and include your @1 pet cause De jour.

We will throw the numbers in a hat an randomly select 5 comments and give money to those FIVE places to celebrate the GSO's FIFTH YEAR!!!

Start commenting NOW!!!

"We don't expect anyone to solve our problems for us...

We'll fight our own battles..."

Hopefully, there will never be a reason for one of our sons to give an address like this one:




Pretty impressive teen, this Zach Whals!

Later that day, the Iowa state house voted to pass a constitutional ammendment banning same sex marriage.

Sad.